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<blockquote data-quote="ksm" data-source="post: 751336" data-attributes="member: 12511"><p>Crayola13 - older has an average IQ, and if she could just delay instant gratification, she could pull this off. If she would take advice from me or anyone else, it would make life easier. But, I get the blame for everything wrong in her life. Last week, she walked thru the living room on her way out to leave with a friend. She announces that her friend has to take her dog to the animal shelter as she can't keep it where she lives...and it's ALL my fault! (How is this my fault? Never met the friend or dog and I don't rent any apartment to her!). Because... She wouldn't have to take it to shelter if I would let DGD have it in our home! Never mind that DGD didn't come home for 4 days! And she NEEDS an emotional support animal!</p><p></p><p>Younger DGD fell "in love" with this loser when she was 14 and he was 17. Age of consent is 16 in our state. She knows she can come home, but we won't allow boyfriend to stay here. Even if he was the most upstanding young man in town! We have tried to be cordial to him, he has come to our home for brief visits when DGD stops by. Trying to keep them apart years ago...(court ordered) only made her more determined. She says she would rather be homeless with him than live without him in our home. Last year, they were living out of her car until they crashed the car. Then they lived in his moms garage.</p><p></p><p>WiseChoices - I like that imagery... I've kind of just had an off day. This life my DGDs have chosen is so far from what I ever imagined. A friend in NarAnon says expectations are just premeditated disappointments. Another friend has a t shirt that says "I gave up all hope and I'm feeling much better now."</p><p></p><p>AppleCori - thanks. If I had to do it all over, I would try differently. But I truly did what I knew to do at the time, I tried reaching out to professionals didn't seem to help. The older is such a little charmer snd manipulator that they could never conceive the level of tantrums at home with no witnesses.</p><p></p><p>Lil - two nights ago, older did get some envelopes and spread her $ between envelopes. Court fines, car savings, phone bill, medical bill (got turned to collections. I had tried to get her to call the hospital and ask for application for patient assistance. She never did. Now it's turned to collections and it's too late. Same thing for a different hospital. She got the application, but never filled it out! She owes less than $1000. Not bad for an two different ER visits, 2 days in ICU, 2 days in regular room, and a 70 mile ambulance ride. She started yelling she will never get out of debt! LOL. She just wants to spend her $ on going to clubs, clothes and fake nails!</p><p></p><p>Ksm</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ksm, post: 751336, member: 12511"] Crayola13 - older has an average IQ, and if she could just delay instant gratification, she could pull this off. If she would take advice from me or anyone else, it would make life easier. But, I get the blame for everything wrong in her life. Last week, she walked thru the living room on her way out to leave with a friend. She announces that her friend has to take her dog to the animal shelter as she can't keep it where she lives...and it's ALL my fault! (How is this my fault? Never met the friend or dog and I don't rent any apartment to her!). Because... She wouldn't have to take it to shelter if I would let DGD have it in our home! Never mind that DGD didn't come home for 4 days! And she NEEDS an emotional support animal! Younger DGD fell "in love" with this loser when she was 14 and he was 17. Age of consent is 16 in our state. She knows she can come home, but we won't allow boyfriend to stay here. Even if he was the most upstanding young man in town! We have tried to be cordial to him, he has come to our home for brief visits when DGD stops by. Trying to keep them apart years ago...(court ordered) only made her more determined. She says she would rather be homeless with him than live without him in our home. Last year, they were living out of her car until they crashed the car. Then they lived in his moms garage. WiseChoices - I like that imagery... I've kind of just had an off day. This life my DGDs have chosen is so far from what I ever imagined. A friend in NarAnon says expectations are just premeditated disappointments. Another friend has a t shirt that says "I gave up all hope and I'm feeling much better now." AppleCori - thanks. If I had to do it all over, I would try differently. But I truly did what I knew to do at the time, I tried reaching out to professionals didn't seem to help. The older is such a little charmer snd manipulator that they could never conceive the level of tantrums at home with no witnesses. Lil - two nights ago, older did get some envelopes and spread her $ between envelopes. Court fines, car savings, phone bill, medical bill (got turned to collections. I had tried to get her to call the hospital and ask for application for patient assistance. She never did. Now it's turned to collections and it's too late. Same thing for a different hospital. She got the application, but never filled it out! She owes less than $1000. Not bad for an two different ER visits, 2 days in ICU, 2 days in regular room, and a 70 mile ambulance ride. She started yelling she will never get out of debt! LOL. She just wants to spend her $ on going to clubs, clothes and fake nails! Ksm [/QUOTE]
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