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Big daddy of a meltdown
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<blockquote data-quote="SuZir" data-source="post: 588384" data-attributes="member: 14557"><p>Malika, that he shows self-control against violent urges is great and something you need to work on further. Because if J's outbursts are partly due his temperament (and I do think he is more feisty than easy going by temperament) he will likely continue to feel big rest of his life. It may well be that he will never turn to be a mild, mellow and easy going person - and that is okay. But because of that he will have to learn more self control over his show of feelings, learn ways to express himself without causing too much ruckus. But some ruckus should also be allowed and even appreciated. It's not wrong to feel big.</p><p></p><p>You said he started to repeat angry, negative sentence. That of course can be putting a aggressive feeling into words (which of course is better than acting it), but as I told about my recent meltdown, for me it works in building up the fury. Maybe if he does that again, you would try to cut that build up some way. Maybe starting to repeat some total nonsesial thing every time he repeats the angry sentence. Is J willing to talk about his meltdown now that it is over? How it felt, why he thinks he did this or that during it etc. did it feel good or bad? If he doesn't like having a meltdown, maybe coming up with some simple strategies he could soothe himself or you could help to calm him? he is of course very young, but maybe he would be able to try something simple to distract himself. Do ask from him, what he thinks would help, when he is feeling disregulated.</p><p></p><p>EDIT: And Malika, if you end up going Steiner route for J, do prepare to few big meltdowns over eurythmy in future <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /> There may be a Steiner kid somewhere, who doesn't harbour deep, dark hatred towards eurythmy classes out there, but every Steiner kid I have ever known have had some intense and violent feelings on that topic. Then again, everyone of them have lived through it and while they may be too scarred to do anything that reminds walking around and flapping their hands while listening music, I'm not sure if that is ruining their lives that much <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/Graemlins/rofl.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":rofl:" title="rofl :rofl:" data-shortname=":rofl:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SuZir, post: 588384, member: 14557"] Malika, that he shows self-control against violent urges is great and something you need to work on further. Because if J's outbursts are partly due his temperament (and I do think he is more feisty than easy going by temperament) he will likely continue to feel big rest of his life. It may well be that he will never turn to be a mild, mellow and easy going person - and that is okay. But because of that he will have to learn more self control over his show of feelings, learn ways to express himself without causing too much ruckus. But some ruckus should also be allowed and even appreciated. It's not wrong to feel big. You said he started to repeat angry, negative sentence. That of course can be putting a aggressive feeling into words (which of course is better than acting it), but as I told about my recent meltdown, for me it works in building up the fury. Maybe if he does that again, you would try to cut that build up some way. Maybe starting to repeat some total nonsesial thing every time he repeats the angry sentence. Is J willing to talk about his meltdown now that it is over? How it felt, why he thinks he did this or that during it etc. did it feel good or bad? If he doesn't like having a meltdown, maybe coming up with some simple strategies he could soothe himself or you could help to calm him? he is of course very young, but maybe he would be able to try something simple to distract himself. Do ask from him, what he thinks would help, when he is feeling disregulated. EDIT: And Malika, if you end up going Steiner route for J, do prepare to few big meltdowns over eurythmy in future :winking: There may be a Steiner kid somewhere, who doesn't harbour deep, dark hatred towards eurythmy classes out there, but every Steiner kid I have ever known have had some intense and violent feelings on that topic. Then again, everyone of them have lived through it and while they may be too scarred to do anything that reminds walking around and flapping their hands while listening music, I'm not sure if that is ruining their lives that much :rofl: [/QUOTE]
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