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<blockquote data-quote="Calamity Jane" data-source="post: 684361" data-attributes="member: 13882"><p>I can't tell you why your son said these things, but I can share with you what my son, 21yrs. old did on Easter Sunday, in the car with me and my husband on the way to the Amtrak train.</p><p></p><p>He told us that all the Christmas money he got from his grandfather went toward a used motorcycle and the paraphernalia (helmet, gloves, etc.) that go with it. That money was supposed to be put aside for his living expenses, and it would've lasted him for the rest of the school year if he was prudent. When we balked at his impulsive, poor and dangerous choice, he, out of the blue, said that he is trying to prove to himself he can be brave, riding a dangerous motorcycle, because I terrified him so much when he was young because I choked him every chance I got!</p><p></p><p>That was a baldfaced fabrication which made both his Dad and I simultaneously howl with laughter and boiling mad. He did not want to be confronted about his poor and impulsive and dangerous decisions, not to mention his wasting his money, so he told an outrageous lie to divert our attention. He probably wanted us to back off, and perhaps to feel sorry for him. It was so outrageously untrue and unkind, esp. after our lovely Easter visit, that is was beyond our understanding. I think he does this for effect, just to change the subject. God only knows what he tells other people, his professors, his friends, etc. about us. When he was in High School and he had a report due, he didn't complete the report, but told his teacher that his Dad locked him out of the house the night before and he had to sleep on the street. He had another project due that involved doing a family tree, which he never completed, and told his teacher that I burned all his baby pictures, so he could not complete the assignment. It's like he will do anything and say anything that is expedient and will take the onus away from him for his bad decisions. He doesn't care one bit if he slanders his own family in the process.</p><p></p><p>Whatever your son is going through, he may be coming to his senses and doesn't want to face his own responsibility for the condition of his life, so it's a convenient mechanism to say these outrageous things - he may even believe them himself! I have no doubt you've been a good, loving mother - so have I - my sacrifices for my kids are like most parents - all I have and all I do is for them. Whatever his reasoning, please don't take it personally. I know how baffling this is and how much it hurts.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Calamity Jane, post: 684361, member: 13882"] I can't tell you why your son said these things, but I can share with you what my son, 21yrs. old did on Easter Sunday, in the car with me and my husband on the way to the Amtrak train. He told us that all the Christmas money he got from his grandfather went toward a used motorcycle and the paraphernalia (helmet, gloves, etc.) that go with it. That money was supposed to be put aside for his living expenses, and it would've lasted him for the rest of the school year if he was prudent. When we balked at his impulsive, poor and dangerous choice, he, out of the blue, said that he is trying to prove to himself he can be brave, riding a dangerous motorcycle, because I terrified him so much when he was young because I choked him every chance I got! That was a baldfaced fabrication which made both his Dad and I simultaneously howl with laughter and boiling mad. He did not want to be confronted about his poor and impulsive and dangerous decisions, not to mention his wasting his money, so he told an outrageous lie to divert our attention. He probably wanted us to back off, and perhaps to feel sorry for him. It was so outrageously untrue and unkind, esp. after our lovely Easter visit, that is was beyond our understanding. I think he does this for effect, just to change the subject. God only knows what he tells other people, his professors, his friends, etc. about us. When he was in High School and he had a report due, he didn't complete the report, but told his teacher that his Dad locked him out of the house the night before and he had to sleep on the street. He had another project due that involved doing a family tree, which he never completed, and told his teacher that I burned all his baby pictures, so he could not complete the assignment. It's like he will do anything and say anything that is expedient and will take the onus away from him for his bad decisions. He doesn't care one bit if he slanders his own family in the process. Whatever your son is going through, he may be coming to his senses and doesn't want to face his own responsibility for the condition of his life, so it's a convenient mechanism to say these outrageous things - he may even believe them himself! I have no doubt you've been a good, loving mother - so have I - my sacrifices for my kids are like most parents - all I have and all I do is for them. Whatever his reasoning, please don't take it personally. I know how baffling this is and how much it hurts. [/QUOTE]
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