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General Parenting
Bipolar daughter - consequences and incentives mean NOTHING
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<blockquote data-quote="Snow White" data-source="post: 738392" data-attributes="member: 355"><p>Hi Knifetomyheart. Welcome here - sorry that you had to land here. I just read your post and it instantly brought back all the memories of our daughter during those teen years.</p><p></p><p>We were in the exact same shoes. Started when she was young - she had all of the services and professionals at her beck and call but they did not work. She was violent, deceitful, made really bad impulsive decisions and constantly ran away. She had an IEP in place but would eventually become abusive with school staff - transferred to different schools and then to a treatment type of school (both locked and unlocked). Those didn't work. We couldn't keep her safe. We signed a voluntary placement order when she was 12 years old (for a 1 year period) and that was the hardest thing I have ever done. Things were looking up a bit and it was felt that an additional 6 to 8 months would be a benefit. She returned home and the nightmare continued until she took off to literally "join the circus" at 18 years of age. Her behaviour pretty much ruined any chance at a normal family life. She ruined relationships with extended family, so that was not an option for us.</p><p></p><p>If the lithium and geodon aren't giving good results, it might be time for the specialists to revisit her medications. Ours would respond briefly to medications but it was not long-lasting. She has been on everything from lithium to valproic acid. Your daughter sounds very much like our daughter, who is now diagnosed with borderline personality disorder (and probably an element of antisocial personality disorder) - medications don't really help. The anger, manipulation and physical violence are often too much to take and nothing seems to slow it down. The rage can be instantaneous (shoelace doesn't tie up properly), catching everyone off guard. We once missed a funeral because of a meltdown at the back door as we were getting ready to leave.</p><p></p><p>There is no right answer for you and your family. I don't know a lot about services in the US, so I can't comment or add anything to SWOT's reply for residential-type services. Have you and your family been for counselling/therapy? That might be beneficial for you, as you try to outline a plan.</p><p></p><p>Keep coming back here. The support is so very helpful. </p><p></p><p>Hugs to you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Snow White, post: 738392, member: 355"] Hi Knifetomyheart. Welcome here - sorry that you had to land here. I just read your post and it instantly brought back all the memories of our daughter during those teen years. We were in the exact same shoes. Started when she was young - she had all of the services and professionals at her beck and call but they did not work. She was violent, deceitful, made really bad impulsive decisions and constantly ran away. She had an IEP in place but would eventually become abusive with school staff - transferred to different schools and then to a treatment type of school (both locked and unlocked). Those didn't work. We couldn't keep her safe. We signed a voluntary placement order when she was 12 years old (for a 1 year period) and that was the hardest thing I have ever done. Things were looking up a bit and it was felt that an additional 6 to 8 months would be a benefit. She returned home and the nightmare continued until she took off to literally "join the circus" at 18 years of age. Her behaviour pretty much ruined any chance at a normal family life. She ruined relationships with extended family, so that was not an option for us. If the lithium and geodon aren't giving good results, it might be time for the specialists to revisit her medications. Ours would respond briefly to medications but it was not long-lasting. She has been on everything from lithium to valproic acid. Your daughter sounds very much like our daughter, who is now diagnosed with borderline personality disorder (and probably an element of antisocial personality disorder) - medications don't really help. The anger, manipulation and physical violence are often too much to take and nothing seems to slow it down. The rage can be instantaneous (shoelace doesn't tie up properly), catching everyone off guard. We once missed a funeral because of a meltdown at the back door as we were getting ready to leave. There is no right answer for you and your family. I don't know a lot about services in the US, so I can't comment or add anything to SWOT's reply for residential-type services. Have you and your family been for counselling/therapy? That might be beneficial for you, as you try to outline a plan. Keep coming back here. The support is so very helpful. Hugs to you. [/QUOTE]
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Bipolar daughter - consequences and incentives mean NOTHING
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