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General Parenting
Biter - 2 years old in Day Care
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<blockquote data-quote="totoro" data-source="post: 307237" data-attributes="member: 3155"><p>We tried ignoring it. Only because giving it attention especially in the beginning for K was acknowledging that it was OK.</p><p>We also would watch, which was one of the hardest parts, what was triggering these biting episodes? </p><p>Was it not getting something she wanted? (obviously for K it went far beyond just a tantrum)</p><p>But in the beginning we were looking for something simple, like was she mad about something, frustrated, hungry, tired, cranky. </p><p>If she did start to have an episode and started to bite, we would get up and walk away, but as we did we would look her in the eye while holding her arms and say in a very firm voice, "You do not bite, you will not hurt me or anyone else!" </p><p>Walk away. But still be able to see her, if she came back after us we would repeat the same things. We would also tell her that we would not talk to her until she could calm down and stop hitting or biting.</p><p>As she calmed down we would ask her what she needed, talk about why she did this, what she could have done to avoid this, what WE could have done better? </p><p>We also NEVER punished her, especially in the beginning. Because we were trying to figure it out and gain trust. </p><p>As time went on, if she started getting upset we would ask her if she needed to take a calming break? Or if she needed to talk about what is getting her upset? </p><p>We still do this with her, obviously things have changed, but it is still in there and it works a lot.</p><p></p><p>Just an idea. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="totoro, post: 307237, member: 3155"] We tried ignoring it. Only because giving it attention especially in the beginning for K was acknowledging that it was OK. We also would watch, which was one of the hardest parts, what was triggering these biting episodes? Was it not getting something she wanted? (obviously for K it went far beyond just a tantrum) But in the beginning we were looking for something simple, like was she mad about something, frustrated, hungry, tired, cranky. If she did start to have an episode and started to bite, we would get up and walk away, but as we did we would look her in the eye while holding her arms and say in a very firm voice, "You do not bite, you will not hurt me or anyone else!" Walk away. But still be able to see her, if she came back after us we would repeat the same things. We would also tell her that we would not talk to her until she could calm down and stop hitting or biting. As she calmed down we would ask her what she needed, talk about why she did this, what she could have done to avoid this, what WE could have done better? We also NEVER punished her, especially in the beginning. Because we were trying to figure it out and gain trust. As time went on, if she started getting upset we would ask her if she needed to take a calming break? Or if she needed to talk about what is getting her upset? We still do this with her, obviously things have changed, but it is still in there and it works a lot. Just an idea. :) [/QUOTE]
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Biter - 2 years old in Day Care
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