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Borderline (BPD)
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<blockquote data-quote="strangeworld" data-source="post: 757294" data-attributes="member: 22313"><p>I haven't been on here in so long I forgot my login info...finally remembered it. I am 99% certain my 21 year old daughter has Borderline (BPD). I think when I first found this website, she was around 17...can't believe it's been that long. My daughter herself thinks she has it. For the last year and a half she and her boyfriend have been living with us. Not sure why we allowed it. Well. Things have gotten ugly since she turned 21. She drinks and becomes verbally and mentally abusive to her boyfriend, manipulative. Tells him she will kill herself if he leaves. She started cutting at 14, we tried therapy for her. Didn't stick. At 15 she got on Zoloft. She traded that for alcohol and pot her senior yr or high school and met her current boyfriend. She dropped out of school and lived with him and at the park.</p><p>Over the years we've tried some therapy, some psychiatry. At 17 we had her do intake interview at behavioral health (she refused to enter program). At 19 years old I got her to agree to do intensive outpatient treatment through a great treatment facility here. She did all the paperwork and then refused to go. In 2018 things were starting to feel better and then our house burned down i the Camp fire. We had to move into town (we were living on the outskirts about 6 miles from town). Thought it would be a new opportunity being in town. Since she doesn't drive, she would be close to everything, be able to look for work or go to community college. Nothing. It has only gotten worse. Today we finally told her she has two weeks to find elsewhere to live. Told her we would be here for her if she decides to help herself. I had to tell her via text since she didn't come home today. She blames us for everything, and her boyfriend. She will not take responsibility for a damn thing. No, we were not perfect parents. We made mistakes. We might have been impatient at times or distracted. We might have yelled at times. We might have not noticed that she needed something because she was quiet and withdrawn and reclusive and thought she was going through a teenage phase. We might have invalidated her feelings sometimes. It's clear now that there will have to be a huge amount of therapy. And sobriety. I have read Stop Walking on Eggshells and When You Love Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder. Most of everything I read sounds like her but now she's 21 and we have to get her out of our house for our own sanity and that of our 17 year old son. The guilt trip and manipulation she just spewed at me theough her texts hurts so much. by the way there is a great Facebook closed group called Parents of Children with Borderline Personality Disorder. It is very active and I find it helpful.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="strangeworld, post: 757294, member: 22313"] I haven't been on here in so long I forgot my login info...finally remembered it. I am 99% certain my 21 year old daughter has Borderline (BPD). I think when I first found this website, she was around 17...can't believe it's been that long. My daughter herself thinks she has it. For the last year and a half she and her boyfriend have been living with us. Not sure why we allowed it. Well. Things have gotten ugly since she turned 21. She drinks and becomes verbally and mentally abusive to her boyfriend, manipulative. Tells him she will kill herself if he leaves. She started cutting at 14, we tried therapy for her. Didn't stick. At 15 she got on Zoloft. She traded that for alcohol and pot her senior yr or high school and met her current boyfriend. She dropped out of school and lived with him and at the park. Over the years we've tried some therapy, some psychiatry. At 17 we had her do intake interview at behavioral health (she refused to enter program). At 19 years old I got her to agree to do intensive outpatient treatment through a great treatment facility here. She did all the paperwork and then refused to go. In 2018 things were starting to feel better and then our house burned down i the Camp fire. We had to move into town (we were living on the outskirts about 6 miles from town). Thought it would be a new opportunity being in town. Since she doesn't drive, she would be close to everything, be able to look for work or go to community college. Nothing. It has only gotten worse. Today we finally told her she has two weeks to find elsewhere to live. Told her we would be here for her if she decides to help herself. I had to tell her via text since she didn't come home today. She blames us for everything, and her boyfriend. She will not take responsibility for a damn thing. No, we were not perfect parents. We made mistakes. We might have been impatient at times or distracted. We might have yelled at times. We might have not noticed that she needed something because she was quiet and withdrawn and reclusive and thought she was going through a teenage phase. We might have invalidated her feelings sometimes. It's clear now that there will have to be a huge amount of therapy. And sobriety. I have read Stop Walking on Eggshells and When You Love Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder. Most of everything I read sounds like her but now she's 21 and we have to get her out of our house for our own sanity and that of our 17 year old son. The guilt trip and manipulation she just spewed at me theough her texts hurts so much. by the way there is a great Facebook closed group called Parents of Children with Borderline Personality Disorder. It is very active and I find it helpful. [/QUOTE]
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