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Parent Emeritus
Boundaries: non existant in her world, will that EVER change???
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<blockquote data-quote="dashcat" data-source="post: 585854" data-attributes="member: 9175"><p>Oh, boy. I have to disagree about cutting up her clothes. To a person who you are trying to teach (or model) the concept of boundaries, I think that is over the line.</p><p></p><p>My difficult child buys all her own clothes. She chooses very hoochie kinds of things and, while I am NOT dealing with an adolescent boy in the house, I do work from home and have customers who come here. I simply tell her (if I'm expecting a customer), "honey, you need to throw on a sweater while XX is here.". She goes with me every once and awhile to my Toastmasters meetings and I'll say the same thing... "pull on a sweatshirt for this" ... something like that. </p><p></p><p>Clothing is very personal. My mom hated how I dressed (because I didn't wear pink peter pan collars in the 1970s) and she was very vocal and critical. It hurt, and it wasn't necessary. I eventually figured it out, and nobody was hurt in the processes ... but I wasn't a difficult child.</p><p></p><p>If you think her clothing choices are harmful to your son, tell her calmly that she has to cover up when he's around. </p><p></p><p>Nothing good can possibly come from your interfering to the point where you take a pair of scissors to her clothes.</p><p></p><p>Dash</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="dashcat, post: 585854, member: 9175"] Oh, boy. I have to disagree about cutting up her clothes. To a person who you are trying to teach (or model) the concept of boundaries, I think that is over the line. My difficult child buys all her own clothes. She chooses very hoochie kinds of things and, while I am NOT dealing with an adolescent boy in the house, I do work from home and have customers who come here. I simply tell her (if I'm expecting a customer), "honey, you need to throw on a sweater while XX is here.". She goes with me every once and awhile to my Toastmasters meetings and I'll say the same thing... "pull on a sweatshirt for this" ... something like that. Clothing is very personal. My mom hated how I dressed (because I didn't wear pink peter pan collars in the 1970s) and she was very vocal and critical. It hurt, and it wasn't necessary. I eventually figured it out, and nobody was hurt in the processes ... but I wasn't a difficult child. If you think her clothing choices are harmful to your son, tell her calmly that she has to cover up when he's around. Nothing good can possibly come from your interfering to the point where you take a pair of scissors to her clothes. Dash [/QUOTE]
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Boundaries: non existant in her world, will that EVER change???
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