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Boys, boys, boys...is it ok to let her be depressed over boys???
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 278598" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>N. will be thirteen next week, but she looks sixteen. Yes, I hate it. Boys tend to find her attractive, and she has this string of "boyfriends." "Boyfriend" means they say they like one another and spend group time together, maybe at the beach once or twice a weak (with lots of people around) and maybe at the skating park. They don't date. They don't do anything 1-1. By doing a bit of snooping I have pretty much tracked that my daughter is not involved sexually in any way--hasn't even kissed a boy. Her friends haven't either, although they all have "boyfriends." </p><p></p><p>The thing with N. is she "falls in love" (ahem--I don't really believe kids that age can love) and then when it falls apart in a few days, she gets upset/depressed. I can tell when this is happening. She puts on a good front for us, however she's my daughter--I can tell when she's upset, even when she holds it together. I want to yell at her that she's not allowed to even pretend to have boyfriends because I think this boyfriend thing is on her mind too much and s he has enough trouble concentrating in school. I doubt this is something I could enforce though because nothing is really happening. I'd sort of have to keep her locked in her room (my hub's idea...lol). J/K. </p><p></p><p>Is there anything GOOD to say to these very young girls when they develop a crush on a very young boy (who is usually even less mature than her). I want to say the right thing. My inclination is to brush it off and say "Look, boys are jerks at this age...just concentrate on sports and your friends and have fun." Somehow I feel that would be insensitive. </p><p></p><p>What would you say to a thirteen year old girl about boys? Nothing? I've given her the sex chat many times and am convinced that she is in no way interested in sex at this point. It's about emotions. As nice as most of these boys are (I know them), they are flattered by girl attention and like a girl one day and another one the next...and I don't think they are as into the girls as the girls are into the boys. </p><p></p><p>I hate for her to waste time on the roller coaster over boys at her young age. Good heavens, I never thought I was in love all the way through high school. I know I had no idea what love is.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 278598, member: 1550"] N. will be thirteen next week, but she looks sixteen. Yes, I hate it. Boys tend to find her attractive, and she has this string of "boyfriends." "Boyfriend" means they say they like one another and spend group time together, maybe at the beach once or twice a weak (with lots of people around) and maybe at the skating park. They don't date. They don't do anything 1-1. By doing a bit of snooping I have pretty much tracked that my daughter is not involved sexually in any way--hasn't even kissed a boy. Her friends haven't either, although they all have "boyfriends." The thing with N. is she "falls in love" (ahem--I don't really believe kids that age can love) and then when it falls apart in a few days, she gets upset/depressed. I can tell when this is happening. She puts on a good front for us, however she's my daughter--I can tell when she's upset, even when she holds it together. I want to yell at her that she's not allowed to even pretend to have boyfriends because I think this boyfriend thing is on her mind too much and s he has enough trouble concentrating in school. I doubt this is something I could enforce though because nothing is really happening. I'd sort of have to keep her locked in her room (my hub's idea...lol). J/K. Is there anything GOOD to say to these very young girls when they develop a crush on a very young boy (who is usually even less mature than her). I want to say the right thing. My inclination is to brush it off and say "Look, boys are jerks at this age...just concentrate on sports and your friends and have fun." Somehow I feel that would be insensitive. What would you say to a thirteen year old girl about boys? Nothing? I've given her the sex chat many times and am convinced that she is in no way interested in sex at this point. It's about emotions. As nice as most of these boys are (I know them), they are flattered by girl attention and like a girl one day and another one the next...and I don't think they are as into the girls as the girls are into the boys. I hate for her to waste time on the roller coaster over boys at her young age. Good heavens, I never thought I was in love all the way through high school. I know I had no idea what love is. [/QUOTE]
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