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<blockquote data-quote="flutterbee" data-source="post: 173236"><p>Steely, intellectually I can see it as black and white thinking, but I perceive it as pessimism. I guess if she ever - even ONE time - had a good day because of a single experience, I would feel differently. But, she can be having a GREAT day and have one little bitty thing happen and it becomes the worst day ever. This isn't new. </p><p></p><p>For example, Christmas a few years ago - she was 8 or 9 - about a half dozen times she hugged me and said, "Thank you, Mom. This is the BEST Christmas ever." Later that same night, the batteries to one of her new games that we had been playing started to die. She shoved it aside and said, "This is the worst Christmas ever." No exaggeration. Every day life is the same way.</p><p></p><p>Tonight she told me that now she WANTS to go to therapy because all I ever do is yell at her and put her down. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/surprise.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":surprise:" title="surprise :surprise:" data-shortname=":surprise:" /> <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/Graemlins/919Mad.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":919Mad:" title="Mad :919Mad:" data-shortname=":919Mad:" /> <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/Graemlins/919Mad.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":919Mad:" title="Mad :919Mad:" data-shortname=":919Mad:" /></p><p></p><p>OMG! I thought my head was going to FALL OFF. You have NO idea how carefully I weigh my words with this child. Yell? You have got to be kidding. I've gotten frustrated and have had a tone, I'm sure, but I haven't yelled. I've wanted to. Several times. But, I haven't.</p><p></p><p>She's miserable, she doesn't want to do anything about it and it's all my fault. Oh, and she only cries when she's been around me. </p><p></p><p>easy child asked if I pointed out that it's probably because she's around me ALL the time, so mathematically she's correct. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/tongue.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":tongue:" title="tongue :tongue:" data-shortname=":tongue:" /></p><p></p><p>I am really not liking my child at all right now. She hoovers the life right out of me when she's like this.</p><p></p><p>I don't care why she goes to therapy. If she wants to go because she wants to complain about her 'horrible' mother - if that's what motivates her - at least she's there. Fine by me.</p><p></p><p>And I don't mean to be snippy. I am just oversensitive to the 'normal child' thing because what she does, the way she thinks and how she reacts is not normal by any stretch of the imagination and all I got for years from the SD was there is nothing wrong with her. Even had a guidance counselor (some of you have heard this before) tell me that, "Wynter doesn't have a problem, Heather. You do."</p><p></p><p>Right now, at this very moment, I've had it up to my eyeballs with this child, with her negativity, with her being a victim, with her being helpless, with it all being my fault. I don't want to talk to her. I don't even want to look at her right now. I need a break from her.</p><p></p><p>Which one of you is volunteering for a sleep over? <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/bigsmile.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":bigsmile:" title="big smile :bigsmile:" data-shortname=":bigsmile:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="flutterbee, post: 173236"] Steely, intellectually I can see it as black and white thinking, but I perceive it as pessimism. I guess if she ever - even ONE time - had a good day because of a single experience, I would feel differently. But, she can be having a GREAT day and have one little bitty thing happen and it becomes the worst day ever. This isn't new. For example, Christmas a few years ago - she was 8 or 9 - about a half dozen times she hugged me and said, "Thank you, Mom. This is the BEST Christmas ever." Later that same night, the batteries to one of her new games that we had been playing started to die. She shoved it aside and said, "This is the worst Christmas ever." No exaggeration. Every day life is the same way. Tonight she told me that now she WANTS to go to therapy because all I ever do is yell at her and put her down. :surprise: :tearinghair: :tearinghair: OMG! I thought my head was going to FALL OFF. You have NO idea how carefully I weigh my words with this child. Yell? You have got to be kidding. I've gotten frustrated and have had a tone, I'm sure, but I haven't yelled. I've wanted to. Several times. But, I haven't. She's miserable, she doesn't want to do anything about it and it's all my fault. Oh, and she only cries when she's been around me. easy child asked if I pointed out that it's probably because she's around me ALL the time, so mathematically she's correct. :raspberry-tounge: I am really not liking my child at all right now. She hoovers the life right out of me when she's like this. I don't care why she goes to therapy. If she wants to go because she wants to complain about her 'horrible' mother - if that's what motivates her - at least she's there. Fine by me. And I don't mean to be snippy. I am just oversensitive to the 'normal child' thing because what she does, the way she thinks and how she reacts is not normal by any stretch of the imagination and all I got for years from the SD was there is nothing wrong with her. Even had a guidance counselor (some of you have heard this before) tell me that, "Wynter doesn't have a problem, Heather. You do." Right now, at this very moment, I've had it up to my eyeballs with this child, with her negativity, with her being a victim, with her being helpless, with it all being my fault. I don't want to talk to her. I don't even want to look at her right now. I need a break from her. Which one of you is volunteering for a sleep over? :bigsmile: [/QUOTE]
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