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General Parenting
But I don't like your rules
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<blockquote data-quote="Allan-Matlem" data-source="post: 240671" data-attributes="member: 10"><p>Hi,</p><p></p><p>Home is not Residential Treatment Center (RTC) , we just don't have the structure to enforce rules . What we really want is that kids indentify and internalize the rules so I think working together with a therapist and your child , to establish understandings and expectations, talking how the structure in place serves the family and child. If she has concerns , I think it is important to discuss them and see if they can be met , see if mtually accepted solutions can be found so her concerns are being addressed. Kids who invest in helping establish rules and expectations have an interest to follow through. A kid who feels pressured into accepting rules will intime rebel , I don't think setting up ourselves for a power struggle is going helps anyone. it is not easy , home is not Residential Treatment Center (RTC) , and trying to be conditional and contingent means more confrontation. it is not easy. In today's world we can no longer control the behavior of people , when they feel respected , understood , supported , when there is relationship , there is hope. I would try and find a mentor or buddy-tutor for her and encourage her to spend one on one time with you , just connecting , chatting etc</p><p>Good luck</p><p>Allan</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Allan-Matlem, post: 240671, member: 10"] Hi, Home is not Residential Treatment Center (RTC) , we just don't have the structure to enforce rules . What we really want is that kids indentify and internalize the rules so I think working together with a therapist and your child , to establish understandings and expectations, talking how the structure in place serves the family and child. If she has concerns , I think it is important to discuss them and see if they can be met , see if mtually accepted solutions can be found so her concerns are being addressed. Kids who invest in helping establish rules and expectations have an interest to follow through. A kid who feels pressured into accepting rules will intime rebel , I don't think setting up ourselves for a power struggle is going helps anyone. it is not easy , home is not Residential Treatment Center (RTC) , and trying to be conditional and contingent means more confrontation. it is not easy. In today's world we can no longer control the behavior of people , when they feel respected , understood , supported , when there is relationship , there is hope. I would try and find a mentor or buddy-tutor for her and encourage her to spend one on one time with you , just connecting , chatting etc Good luck Allan [/QUOTE]
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But I don't like your rules
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