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Substance Abuse
Can we stop the train crash?
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<blockquote data-quote="JayPee" data-source="post: 758909" data-attributes="member: 23405"><p>Sunshine,</p><p></p><p>I'm sorry for all you're going through. Most of us on this site have experienced a lot of what you're going through to some degree. It's likely not identical but similar. This forum will help you if you continue to engage and share. Part of that, besides the great wisdom, courage and strength many have to offer on this site, is the fact that you are coming out of denial of the problem(s) with your son. Once we put the issue out there and expose it and share it, we (I feel) begin the healing process. When we hide or squash a problem, I think we spend so much energy on that instead of focusing on getting better. </p><p></p><p>I agree with the comments from others. Keep doing what you need to do while you are legally responsible for your son but start working on a Plan of what boundaries your future may need to hold once he's 18. </p><p></p><p>It took me years and years and years to begin to take the focus off my alcoholic husband and my two adults sons (27 and 31). I lived in murky waters and didn't realize I was important and needed to care for myself. Until I began to see how "sick" I was from my obsession with their problems, drinking, drugs, mental issues etc. through Al anon, therapy, this support group and good books to inspire and uplift me, I didn't even know I needed the help.</p><p></p><p>To me, when you realize "YOU" are just as important as everyone else you want to save and rescue, you will have some change in the situation. There may be no change from those whom you love with theses problems (right away) but if you take care of yourself, you will empower yourself.</p><p></p><p>Miss Lulu...thank you for your post. I needed to hear what you said today.</p><p></p><p>Many prayers coming your way Sunshine!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="JayPee, post: 758909, member: 23405"] Sunshine, I'm sorry for all you're going through. Most of us on this site have experienced a lot of what you're going through to some degree. It's likely not identical but similar. This forum will help you if you continue to engage and share. Part of that, besides the great wisdom, courage and strength many have to offer on this site, is the fact that you are coming out of denial of the problem(s) with your son. Once we put the issue out there and expose it and share it, we (I feel) begin the healing process. When we hide or squash a problem, I think we spend so much energy on that instead of focusing on getting better. I agree with the comments from others. Keep doing what you need to do while you are legally responsible for your son but start working on a Plan of what boundaries your future may need to hold once he's 18. It took me years and years and years to begin to take the focus off my alcoholic husband and my two adults sons (27 and 31). I lived in murky waters and didn't realize I was important and needed to care for myself. Until I began to see how "sick" I was from my obsession with their problems, drinking, drugs, mental issues etc. through Al anon, therapy, this support group and good books to inspire and uplift me, I didn't even know I needed the help. To me, when you realize "YOU" are just as important as everyone else you want to save and rescue, you will have some change in the situation. There may be no change from those whom you love with theses problems (right away) but if you take care of yourself, you will empower yourself. Miss Lulu...thank you for your post. I needed to hear what you said today. Many prayers coming your way Sunshine! [/QUOTE]
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Can we stop the train crash?
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