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Child support issue. I don't know what to do!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 527587" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>There is NO WAY that a man crying hardship would voluntarily OFFER to pay you more if you dropped the case. Stop a minute. Turn off the fear and the emotions. Think about this logically. $232 per month is $2784 per year. You know this man. Would he EVER spend that much $ on something that was not for HIS benefit?? If he truly IS experiencing hardship, then why is his wife not working? Is she disabled? Does she have a child who needs her to be available 24/7? How do they manage if he cannot afford the amt of support his is offering?</p><p></p><p>It is YOUR JOB to take care of your children. To do what is BEST for them. Is it truly in their best interest to have NO enforceable support from their dad? Sure, he paid you before. But the month when you were really really hurting, he shorted you and you had to go to the food bank. Is that what a good dad does? NO, sweetie, absolutely not. My husband would live on rice and beans before he EVER let our kids go without. There just is not way he would ever have shorted support for his kids if he knew they might go hungry. MIGHT, not would, would be enough for a truly good dad.</p><p></p><p>Don't close the case. It can be super hard to get that order back if you let it go several times. Your ex could also use not having an order of support to show that you are NEGLECTING the kids by not making sure they have a steady stream of support from him. Yes, I do know how backazzwards that is, but I also know women who have had to deal with this in court. They dropped support orders/cases, let the dads pay 'what they could' and then the dad got an order for support from the state because mom needed social services so dear ole dad filed for custody on the grounds that she neglected them by dropping the support case. I even know a mom who LOST CUSTODY because this and had to pay support to her ex. He let her keep the kids at her house because he didn't really want them (totally hurt them) and he still refused to pay her a DIME because well, she wasn't even 'allowed' to have them. He even insisted they stay with her when she was HOMELESS and he was ordered to have custody. She finally got the youngest one old enough to testify and taped his phone calls about everything, then took him back to court. But it took her four YEARS where for 2 of them she was homeless with 4 kids to do that. Dad knew that his kids were homeless, but he and new wifey had a new baby and the 4 kids were 'too much mess' in the house so they didn't want them. None of the kids will even speak to him now, of course, but it was a long, hard way to grow up.</p><p></p><p>Don't you DARE drop that support case. This is NOT for you. This is so the kdis will KNOW they have a source of support they can COUNT ON that is ENFORCEABLE. So what if he doesn't like it? He probably has been told by his atty that his hardship claim will NOT be well received and he will pay more. So he is trying to get you to think this is a 'sure thing' when really he won't have to pay a dime in support. </p><p></p><p>There is NO WAY he would offer you that much more a month if he truly had hardship. No possible way. It totally makes no sense.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 527587, member: 1233"] There is NO WAY that a man crying hardship would voluntarily OFFER to pay you more if you dropped the case. Stop a minute. Turn off the fear and the emotions. Think about this logically. $232 per month is $2784 per year. You know this man. Would he EVER spend that much $ on something that was not for HIS benefit?? If he truly IS experiencing hardship, then why is his wife not working? Is she disabled? Does she have a child who needs her to be available 24/7? How do they manage if he cannot afford the amt of support his is offering? It is YOUR JOB to take care of your children. To do what is BEST for them. Is it truly in their best interest to have NO enforceable support from their dad? Sure, he paid you before. But the month when you were really really hurting, he shorted you and you had to go to the food bank. Is that what a good dad does? NO, sweetie, absolutely not. My husband would live on rice and beans before he EVER let our kids go without. There just is not way he would ever have shorted support for his kids if he knew they might go hungry. MIGHT, not would, would be enough for a truly good dad. Don't close the case. It can be super hard to get that order back if you let it go several times. Your ex could also use not having an order of support to show that you are NEGLECTING the kids by not making sure they have a steady stream of support from him. Yes, I do know how backazzwards that is, but I also know women who have had to deal with this in court. They dropped support orders/cases, let the dads pay 'what they could' and then the dad got an order for support from the state because mom needed social services so dear ole dad filed for custody on the grounds that she neglected them by dropping the support case. I even know a mom who LOST CUSTODY because this and had to pay support to her ex. He let her keep the kids at her house because he didn't really want them (totally hurt them) and he still refused to pay her a DIME because well, she wasn't even 'allowed' to have them. He even insisted they stay with her when she was HOMELESS and he was ordered to have custody. She finally got the youngest one old enough to testify and taped his phone calls about everything, then took him back to court. But it took her four YEARS where for 2 of them she was homeless with 4 kids to do that. Dad knew that his kids were homeless, but he and new wifey had a new baby and the 4 kids were 'too much mess' in the house so they didn't want them. None of the kids will even speak to him now, of course, but it was a long, hard way to grow up. Don't you DARE drop that support case. This is NOT for you. This is so the kdis will KNOW they have a source of support they can COUNT ON that is ENFORCEABLE. So what if he doesn't like it? He probably has been told by his atty that his hardship claim will NOT be well received and he will pay more. So he is trying to get you to think this is a 'sure thing' when really he won't have to pay a dime in support. There is NO WAY he would offer you that much more a month if he truly had hardship. No possible way. It totally makes no sense. [/QUOTE]
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Child support issue. I don't know what to do!!!
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