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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 309947" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Thanks, Terry.</p><p></p><p>I read this trying to mentally apply it to difficult child 3 and I'm having difficulty making it fit. I propose a fourth category which can overlap the others - Topic. It's not merely Content, it's not merely Use but it covers both to an extent.</p><p></p><p>It's a big problem for difficult child 3 - what he chooses to try to communicate about. What he is capable of communicating about. Because not only does he only seem to choose to talk about highly specific things that are only of interest or relevance to him, but if the conversation drifts to something else he has great difficulty keeping up with it let alone knowing when to insert himself into the conversation at all, let alone appropriately.</p><p></p><p>Communication also needs to be received. We may consider ourselves good communicators, but if we are attemtping to communicate with someone on the spectrum, we may fail NOT because we ourselves lacked what was needed, but because the intended recipient was unable to access it.</p><p></p><p>Our biggest [roblems in teaching difficult child 3 to communcate more effectively, are primarily issues with his limited topic areas. He can develop all the skills possible in the three areas mentioned, but if he is simply not interested in communicating outside his own very narrow range of interests, then communication won't happen.</p><p></p><p>He still seems to default to a belief that whatever he just witnessed/experienced, we did exactly the same. When pressed he knows tis is not so, intellectually. However, in the excitement of the moment he assumes we are all on the same wavelength.</p><p>Example - he is watching "Funniest Home Videos" while I'm watching the news on another network. He rushes in. "Did you see that last one? wasn't it funny?"</p><p>"Darling, I'm not watching 'Funniest Home Videos'. I'm watching the news. I didn't see the video clip."</p><p>He continues. "Did you laugh when the dog jumped for the ball and missed? I did!"</p><p></p><p>When he has time to really think, he knows I need to see it too. Often when he is watching a taped program he will call me in so we can watch a segment together, THEN he will ask me what I thought. But in the rush - the default setting is a problem. And there seems nothing I can do about it.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 309947, member: 1991"] Thanks, Terry. I read this trying to mentally apply it to difficult child 3 and I'm having difficulty making it fit. I propose a fourth category which can overlap the others - Topic. It's not merely Content, it's not merely Use but it covers both to an extent. It's a big problem for difficult child 3 - what he chooses to try to communicate about. What he is capable of communicating about. Because not only does he only seem to choose to talk about highly specific things that are only of interest or relevance to him, but if the conversation drifts to something else he has great difficulty keeping up with it let alone knowing when to insert himself into the conversation at all, let alone appropriately. Communication also needs to be received. We may consider ourselves good communicators, but if we are attemtping to communicate with someone on the spectrum, we may fail NOT because we ourselves lacked what was needed, but because the intended recipient was unable to access it. Our biggest [roblems in teaching difficult child 3 to communcate more effectively, are primarily issues with his limited topic areas. He can develop all the skills possible in the three areas mentioned, but if he is simply not interested in communicating outside his own very narrow range of interests, then communication won't happen. He still seems to default to a belief that whatever he just witnessed/experienced, we did exactly the same. When pressed he knows tis is not so, intellectually. However, in the excitement of the moment he assumes we are all on the same wavelength. Example - he is watching "Funniest Home Videos" while I'm watching the news on another network. He rushes in. "Did you see that last one? wasn't it funny?" "Darling, I'm not watching 'Funniest Home Videos'. I'm watching the news. I didn't see the video clip." He continues. "Did you laugh when the dog jumped for the ball and missed? I did!" When he has time to really think, he knows I need to see it too. Often when he is watching a taped program he will call me in so we can watch a segment together, THEN he will ask me what I thought. But in the rush - the default setting is a problem. And there seems nothing I can do about it. Marg [/QUOTE]
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