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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 276513" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>Thanks all- I'll see how this meeting goes. I was unaware of it until I got a letter in the mail last week and frankly, was surprised that I'm allowed to attend. While he was in processing last month, they had meetings and did evaluation's and assessments without my involvement and would have not had half the info regarding mental health if I hadn't taken initiative to call them and mail stuff to them. Still, I don't think they read it.</p><p></p><p>The goal for us to be in therapy together has been my goal, with recommendations from previous mental health providers. It has not been even mentioned as a goal by anyone in Department of Juvenile Justice to this point. The parole officer had said maybe we could do that after difficult child comes home- my stance is that he isn't coming home if it's not done before hand. My therapist had said this too. They (in Department of Juvenile Justice) keep throwing out reminders that they are not a mental health care facility and not to expect that from them. difficult child has not had a therapist assigned yet. He has a person called a couselor but she is a cm and does not counsel. Really, she only keeps his Department of Juvenile Justice records compiled. I'll see how this goes next week - the parole officer won't be there so I'm not so sure there is as much coordination between him and the people in Department of Juvenile Justice as I'd hoped. He has already shown me that he doesn't care about hearing difficult child's history or problems at home from me and that is not a good sign.</p><p></p><p>The jest of what I'm hearing so far is that the therapist will be doing beh mod- nothing else- as Janet suggests. The parole officer is supposed to call me once a month and see me every 3 mos just to touch base. He is definitely not there as a resource for me. </p><p></p><p>As far as rules when difficult child is living at home- the first time difficult child was on probation he had a great PO and she was VERY supportive of me as a parent. She was willing to discuss things with me over the phone when difficult child wasn't around so we could come to agreement then support each other in front of difficult child. The PO he had the past 2 years was not willing to do that. So, I approached this by telling difficult child he had to do the stricter of the rules laid down by me and PO. The the PO started undermining that by telling difficult child and me together that I should change those rules. Those were rules already "blessed" by the mental health providers.</p><p></p><p>They do need to know now that they shouldn't bank on me allowing difficult child to come home when they unlock the door. If they accept this now, they can line up something else with crime prevention/Department of Juvenile Justice funds- waiting lists included. If not, what they do is tell the parent the day the kid is released and the parent either has to turn the kid over to dss or they turn the kid over as being abandoned. In either case, difficult child would go to my bro. DSS does not send kids to foster care or group homes if they can get a family member to take him/her. I was told this by the parole officer and others in the system so it's not just my speculation.</p><p></p><p>MWM- difficult child hadn't been doing illegal drugs, as of yet. I do see signs in him that he will try to self-medicate and start them if something doesn't change. He was smoking cigs and trying to "alter" his moods with sugar intake- or whatever you want to call it. If he was truly manic in those phases, he would be compulsive with sugary foods and sodas. He said his medications didn't help- several combos were tried to no avail.</p><p></p><p>He's incarcerated for putting a knife at my neck and demanding cigs from me. He's in Department of Juvenile Justice with a guy committed for a very long time for stabbinmg his grandmother to death.</p><p></p><p>DDD- what you're saying is what Department of Juvenile Justice claims they have as an objective. The prolem is that they really don't do things to meet that goal. It's written on the website and so forth- just like sd's claim to care for kids' educations so much. What they do ITRW falls short of amking that happen in most cases.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 276513, member: 3699"] Thanks all- I'll see how this meeting goes. I was unaware of it until I got a letter in the mail last week and frankly, was surprised that I'm allowed to attend. While he was in processing last month, they had meetings and did evaluation's and assessments without my involvement and would have not had half the info regarding mental health if I hadn't taken initiative to call them and mail stuff to them. Still, I don't think they read it. The goal for us to be in therapy together has been my goal, with recommendations from previous mental health providers. It has not been even mentioned as a goal by anyone in Department of Juvenile Justice to this point. The parole officer had said maybe we could do that after difficult child comes home- my stance is that he isn't coming home if it's not done before hand. My therapist had said this too. They (in Department of Juvenile Justice) keep throwing out reminders that they are not a mental health care facility and not to expect that from them. difficult child has not had a therapist assigned yet. He has a person called a couselor but she is a cm and does not counsel. Really, she only keeps his Department of Juvenile Justice records compiled. I'll see how this goes next week - the parole officer won't be there so I'm not so sure there is as much coordination between him and the people in Department of Juvenile Justice as I'd hoped. He has already shown me that he doesn't care about hearing difficult child's history or problems at home from me and that is not a good sign. The jest of what I'm hearing so far is that the therapist will be doing beh mod- nothing else- as Janet suggests. The parole officer is supposed to call me once a month and see me every 3 mos just to touch base. He is definitely not there as a resource for me. As far as rules when difficult child is living at home- the first time difficult child was on probation he had a great PO and she was VERY supportive of me as a parent. She was willing to discuss things with me over the phone when difficult child wasn't around so we could come to agreement then support each other in front of difficult child. The PO he had the past 2 years was not willing to do that. So, I approached this by telling difficult child he had to do the stricter of the rules laid down by me and PO. The the PO started undermining that by telling difficult child and me together that I should change those rules. Those were rules already "blessed" by the mental health providers. They do need to know now that they shouldn't bank on me allowing difficult child to come home when they unlock the door. If they accept this now, they can line up something else with crime prevention/Department of Juvenile Justice funds- waiting lists included. If not, what they do is tell the parent the day the kid is released and the parent either has to turn the kid over to dss or they turn the kid over as being abandoned. In either case, difficult child would go to my bro. DSS does not send kids to foster care or group homes if they can get a family member to take him/her. I was told this by the parole officer and others in the system so it's not just my speculation. MWM- difficult child hadn't been doing illegal drugs, as of yet. I do see signs in him that he will try to self-medicate and start them if something doesn't change. He was smoking cigs and trying to "alter" his moods with sugar intake- or whatever you want to call it. If he was truly manic in those phases, he would be compulsive with sugary foods and sodas. He said his medications didn't help- several combos were tried to no avail. He's incarcerated for putting a knife at my neck and demanding cigs from me. He's in Department of Juvenile Justice with a guy committed for a very long time for stabbinmg his grandmother to death. DDD- what you're saying is what Department of Juvenile Justice claims they have as an objective. The prolem is that they really don't do things to meet that goal. It's written on the website and so forth- just like sd's claim to care for kids' educations so much. What they do ITRW falls short of amking that happen in most cases. [/QUOTE]
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