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Confused about transitioning
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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 276536" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>It's my understanding that they develop this "plan" now that includes and outlines what difficult child has to do while incarcerated and tentatively what to expect upon release. (The part about what the parole officer requires upon release is subject to change.) Anyway, that typically means that the kid goes home if the parent agrees to it. I'm not so sure that if the parent doesn't agree to that, that it means an abandonment charge. To me, it means the parent is not in agreement with the kid coming straight home and even the parole officer said this was an option and the they try to reunify as soon as possible. (He also told me a bunch of stuff about waiting lists and so forth to make surre I signed that tentative "plan" last month, which I did, but I shouldn't have.) I think making this happen requires getting Department of Juvenile Justice to agree that it is not a good idea for the kid to go straight home- that the kid will need a transitional period. The kid does not go to dss in these cases because it is still Department of Juvenile Justice funding things. It's like going to a half-way house. This is what I'm going to discuss with them- maybe it would help if I took some photos of the damage he did to the house.</p><p></p><p>Now, if that is NOT established in this Department of Juvenile Justice "plan" that they are laying out now, and they go on as if the parent is picking this kid up when the gate is unlocked, then the parent doesn't pick the kid up- that is turned over to dss for abandonment. That is why I am pushing to change the plan now- to make sure it does not get to that point.</p><p></p><p>They can't accuse me of abandoning him while he's incarcerated as long as I visit, call, and/or write and I'm doing all of the above. I am telling difficult child, though, that I am not convinced that him coming straight home will give him the best opportunity for making sure he never gets into legal trouble again.</p><p></p><p>I'm in agreement with a couple of tdocs/psychiatrists who saw difficult child about how effective this will be for him- and that is it won't be efrfective. difficult child is one who insterad of learning his lesson when a punishment gets harsher, it then serves to require that form of punishment almost always in the future before he'll quit pushing limits again. But this didn't all get to this point bby pushing limits exactly. His self-control was spiraling out of control in ways that effected all his life- not just illegal behavior. I honestly do not believe that coming back to more of the same is the answer for this kid. Just like it got mentioned that kids get into the foster care system, then always identify with that- that happens with kids in Department of Juvenile Justice, too, and everything in me tells me this is difficult child's future unless this "plan" changes- then that only gives difficult child a better shot, it will still be up to him, of course.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 276536, member: 3699"] It's my understanding that they develop this "plan" now that includes and outlines what difficult child has to do while incarcerated and tentatively what to expect upon release. (The part about what the parole officer requires upon release is subject to change.) Anyway, that typically means that the kid goes home if the parent agrees to it. I'm not so sure that if the parent doesn't agree to that, that it means an abandonment charge. To me, it means the parent is not in agreement with the kid coming straight home and even the parole officer said this was an option and the they try to reunify as soon as possible. (He also told me a bunch of stuff about waiting lists and so forth to make surre I signed that tentative "plan" last month, which I did, but I shouldn't have.) I think making this happen requires getting Department of Juvenile Justice to agree that it is not a good idea for the kid to go straight home- that the kid will need a transitional period. The kid does not go to dss in these cases because it is still Department of Juvenile Justice funding things. It's like going to a half-way house. This is what I'm going to discuss with them- maybe it would help if I took some photos of the damage he did to the house. Now, if that is NOT established in this Department of Juvenile Justice "plan" that they are laying out now, and they go on as if the parent is picking this kid up when the gate is unlocked, then the parent doesn't pick the kid up- that is turned over to dss for abandonment. That is why I am pushing to change the plan now- to make sure it does not get to that point. They can't accuse me of abandoning him while he's incarcerated as long as I visit, call, and/or write and I'm doing all of the above. I am telling difficult child, though, that I am not convinced that him coming straight home will give him the best opportunity for making sure he never gets into legal trouble again. I'm in agreement with a couple of tdocs/psychiatrists who saw difficult child about how effective this will be for him- and that is it won't be efrfective. difficult child is one who insterad of learning his lesson when a punishment gets harsher, it then serves to require that form of punishment almost always in the future before he'll quit pushing limits again. But this didn't all get to this point bby pushing limits exactly. His self-control was spiraling out of control in ways that effected all his life- not just illegal behavior. I honestly do not believe that coming back to more of the same is the answer for this kid. Just like it got mentioned that kids get into the foster care system, then always identify with that- that happens with kids in Department of Juvenile Justice, too, and everything in me tells me this is difficult child's future unless this "plan" changes- then that only gives difficult child a better shot, it will still be up to him, of course. [/QUOTE]
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