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The Watercooler
Could use some bead rattling for my sister in law (and my S/O and his entire family)
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 378178" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>mother in law sounds like she's enabling her, big time. And S/O to a certain extent is also enabling his mother, if he "makes allowances" because she lost her husband recently. It was long enough ago for her to be functioning sufficiently, to be realistic about sister in law in hospital. Grief is one thing; totally ignoring what is going on is something very different.</p><p></p><p>When mother in law changed the subject to the weather, S/O should have called her on it; confronted her and said, "Please answer my question. Or tell me you refuse to. Don't just pretend you didn't hear me."</p><p></p><p>mother in law has to own acknowledgement, at the very least. Allowing her to slide out of answering at all, is very unhealthy. But it sounds like there has been a lifetime pattern built out of "Don't challenge mother when she's refusing to deal with things."</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 378178, member: 1991"] mother in law sounds like she's enabling her, big time. And S/O to a certain extent is also enabling his mother, if he "makes allowances" because she lost her husband recently. It was long enough ago for her to be functioning sufficiently, to be realistic about sister in law in hospital. Grief is one thing; totally ignoring what is going on is something very different. When mother in law changed the subject to the weather, S/O should have called her on it; confronted her and said, "Please answer my question. Or tell me you refuse to. Don't just pretend you didn't hear me." mother in law has to own acknowledgement, at the very least. Allowing her to slide out of answering at all, is very unhealthy. But it sounds like there has been a lifetime pattern built out of "Don't challenge mother when she's refusing to deal with things." Marg [/QUOTE]
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The Watercooler
Could use some bead rattling for my sister in law (and my S/O and his entire family)
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