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Could use some insight
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<blockquote data-quote="goldenguru" data-source="post: 111434" data-attributes="member: 1545"><p>Hi JMS and welcome.</p><p></p><p>While your story is heartbreaking, it is all too familiar for most of us hereabouts.</p><p></p><p>A couple of suggestions. Get a hold of a book called Boundaries by Cloud and Townsend. You can find a used copy on Amazon for a few bucks. Read it. Read it again. Secondly, get yourself into a 12 step program for families of addicts. You could try AlAnon or Families Anonymous. It really helps to connect with other families who have addicted loved ones.</p><p></p><p>If at all possible sit down with your ex and figure out a plan. Allowing your son to bounce back and forth when things get tough isn't doing him any favors. Come up with a 'family' plan and try really hard to stick to it.</p><p></p><p>You have a few precious months before your son turns 18. And then the legal system will be less prone to be tolerant of your son's behaviors.</p><p></p><p>I might suggest trying to coerce him into some sort of a rehab if you feel that the drugs are the root of his issues. If on the other hand you feel that he is rebellious and taking drugs as another way to rebel, then perhaps it is best to allow some real life consequences for his behaviors (like sitting in jail instead of getting bailed out). You may need a professional to help you figure out what you are really dealing with.</p><p></p><p>I'm sorry you're going though this. It is not easy. Come here and post often. It really helps to 'talk' to other parents who have been where you are.</p><p></p><p>Hugs.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="goldenguru, post: 111434, member: 1545"] Hi JMS and welcome. While your story is heartbreaking, it is all too familiar for most of us hereabouts. A couple of suggestions. Get a hold of a book called Boundaries by Cloud and Townsend. You can find a used copy on Amazon for a few bucks. Read it. Read it again. Secondly, get yourself into a 12 step program for families of addicts. You could try AlAnon or Families Anonymous. It really helps to connect with other families who have addicted loved ones. If at all possible sit down with your ex and figure out a plan. Allowing your son to bounce back and forth when things get tough isn't doing him any favors. Come up with a 'family' plan and try really hard to stick to it. You have a few precious months before your son turns 18. And then the legal system will be less prone to be tolerant of your son's behaviors. I might suggest trying to coerce him into some sort of a rehab if you feel that the drugs are the root of his issues. If on the other hand you feel that he is rebellious and taking drugs as another way to rebel, then perhaps it is best to allow some real life consequences for his behaviors (like sitting in jail instead of getting bailed out). You may need a professional to help you figure out what you are really dealing with. I'm sorry you're going though this. It is not easy. Come here and post often. It really helps to 'talk' to other parents who have been where you are. Hugs. [/QUOTE]
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