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Substance Abuse
Court Tuesday - not good
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<blockquote data-quote="AmericanGirl" data-source="post: 507279"><p>Really good thoughts here...thank you. I'll copy exhausted question below and add my answers as I think it summarizes most of the issues:</p><p></p><p>Questions:</p><p></p><p>1. Can he get treatments through the system? (yes, there are dui classes (both for single and dual diagnoses. therapy is also available.) But he needs court ordered.</p><p>2. If he stays in school and you pay the fine, do you think that he will be able to finish? Has his desire to be sober been more sincere as of late? Yes. Sober? Dunno. Went to Celebrate Recovery for the first time in a month last night. I asked him to do so.</p><p>3. Do you know for a fact that his grades are good? I know about two for sure. The other I am almost certain. The last one - dunno but getting info from source on Monday.</p><p>4. What does he want? Does he want to stay in school? Who knows? He doesn't care about anything.</p><p>5. Will stabalizing him and getting his medications. on track help him so he can finish school? Yes. But he isn't good about taking pills. With his history of selling Adderall for alcohol cash, I am worried about sending him with Risperidal. (doctor prescribed but he wouldn't take so I never filled.)</p><p>6. Does he own his MH issues along with the substance abuse? Or is this still iffy? You cant get better if you don't own your issues. As for the depression, yes but again he isn't good about the pills. I haven't used the word bipolar but in discussions, he indicates it isn't a big deal to him.</p><p>7. Can he get a work study job at school? I always was able to find one of these. I usually did this and had a part time job outside the University. Jobs are hard for kids to get in college towns, but he could be riding public transit if he needed to go further away from school. Not at school. Says he has applied for works everywhere. He agreed last night to apply at Lowe's today. They have big signs out saying they need people. A little while ago, he texted me and said he felt bad and wanted to play xbox with his friend. He wanted to go tomorrow. When I pushed him to honor his commitment, he told me I was pestering him.</p><p>8. Has he gone to the student counseling center and asked them for advise. I know he is not the first kid in this situation. They might be able to help?? I think he needs to show some initiative. I know our immature difficult children, and esp. those with MH issues just lag in the initiative department, but maybe if pointed in a direction he can head that way. No. He knows it is available but frankly, it isn't that good. There's a local minister who would counsel him. He says he likes the guy but he hasn't gone. </p><p>9. Is school the most important thing for him? How does it help him? I think he is in school because it is easier than working.</p><p>10. If you pay the fine can you request some kind of probation or court orders for treatment? And will you let him know you will not do this again? Dunno about asking for stuff. </p><p></p><p>Here's one line of thought. I talk to public defender. Tell him difficult child was detoxing when the theft happened. That local treatment facility wanted him to go to inpatient but he refused. I knew he was sick. No history of stealing. Explain he admits to a drinking problem. diagnosis as depressed. Not compliant with medications. diagnosis as bipolar recently. Not compliant. Ask him to consider finding a way to order counseling, treatment, etc. difficult child will be ****** but what else is new?</p><p></p><p>I don't see any good end to this. If I pay it, then he stays in school. However, if he won't get a job, I simply cannot continue allowing him to "molt" in school. He isn't really trying, just clocking time. And it is a matter of time before he gets in trouble again for something.</p><p></p><p>If I don't pay it, then he fails probably two classes. He will use this as an excuse to do even less in school. I'll tell him I won't pay for school this summer and he needs to find full time work. He'll use car as excuse to not do that. He'll couch surf and end up getting in trouble again.</p><p></p><p>I don't think jail will have any effect on him except maybe teaching him worse things. He needs to get chemically under control with no alcohol and proper medications. He needs treatment and counseling.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="AmericanGirl, post: 507279"] Really good thoughts here...thank you. I'll copy exhausted question below and add my answers as I think it summarizes most of the issues: Questions: 1. Can he get treatments through the system? (yes, there are dui classes (both for single and dual diagnoses. therapy is also available.) But he needs court ordered. 2. If he stays in school and you pay the fine, do you think that he will be able to finish? Has his desire to be sober been more sincere as of late? Yes. Sober? Dunno. Went to Celebrate Recovery for the first time in a month last night. I asked him to do so. 3. Do you know for a fact that his grades are good? I know about two for sure. The other I am almost certain. The last one - dunno but getting info from source on Monday. 4. What does he want? Does he want to stay in school? Who knows? He doesn't care about anything. 5. Will stabalizing him and getting his medications. on track help him so he can finish school? Yes. But he isn't good about taking pills. With his history of selling Adderall for alcohol cash, I am worried about sending him with Risperidal. (doctor prescribed but he wouldn't take so I never filled.) 6. Does he own his MH issues along with the substance abuse? Or is this still iffy? You cant get better if you don't own your issues. As for the depression, yes but again he isn't good about the pills. I haven't used the word bipolar but in discussions, he indicates it isn't a big deal to him. 7. Can he get a work study job at school? I always was able to find one of these. I usually did this and had a part time job outside the University. Jobs are hard for kids to get in college towns, but he could be riding public transit if he needed to go further away from school. Not at school. Says he has applied for works everywhere. He agreed last night to apply at Lowe's today. They have big signs out saying they need people. A little while ago, he texted me and said he felt bad and wanted to play xbox with his friend. He wanted to go tomorrow. When I pushed him to honor his commitment, he told me I was pestering him. 8. Has he gone to the student counseling center and asked them for advise. I know he is not the first kid in this situation. They might be able to help?? I think he needs to show some initiative. I know our immature difficult children, and esp. those with MH issues just lag in the initiative department, but maybe if pointed in a direction he can head that way. No. He knows it is available but frankly, it isn't that good. There's a local minister who would counsel him. He says he likes the guy but he hasn't gone. 9. Is school the most important thing for him? How does it help him? I think he is in school because it is easier than working. 10. If you pay the fine can you request some kind of probation or court orders for treatment? And will you let him know you will not do this again? Dunno about asking for stuff. Here's one line of thought. I talk to public defender. Tell him difficult child was detoxing when the theft happened. That local treatment facility wanted him to go to inpatient but he refused. I knew he was sick. No history of stealing. Explain he admits to a drinking problem. diagnosis as depressed. Not compliant with medications. diagnosis as bipolar recently. Not compliant. Ask him to consider finding a way to order counseling, treatment, etc. difficult child will be ****** but what else is new? I don't see any good end to this. If I pay it, then he stays in school. However, if he won't get a job, I simply cannot continue allowing him to "molt" in school. He isn't really trying, just clocking time. And it is a matter of time before he gets in trouble again for something. If I don't pay it, then he fails probably two classes. He will use this as an excuse to do even less in school. I'll tell him I won't pay for school this summer and he needs to find full time work. He'll use car as excuse to not do that. He'll couch surf and end up getting in trouble again. I don't think jail will have any effect on him except maybe teaching him worse things. He needs to get chemically under control with no alcohol and proper medications. He needs treatment and counseling. [/QUOTE]
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