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Daisy...here is that poem on borderline for you
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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 439974" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>Well granted I dont think that someone smaller than me could ever contain me unless it was one of my kids because I wouldnt want to hurt them. </p><p></p><p>I so badly needed limits and someone to contain me and show me that no matter how bad I was that they werent going to leave me or throw me away and I think that is what every person with borderline needs. We think we are trash and are going to be tossed away. I will be honest here and say that Ms Ally may have one thing wrong, it isnt YOU that needs to start being the one to hug and love her, its daddy. She needs to be brought almost back to a little girl and feel like daddy's little princess. </p><p></p><p>The therapy is going to have to be lengthy though. It is tough. She will have to learn to handle feeling irritated and not lash out. I can now get witchy or snappy and just pout or ask for a hug because I dont feel well when before I would throw a plate across the room. </p><p></p><p>Let me give a prime example of something that happened right at the beginning of therapy.</p><p></p><p>Tony works in construction and often works out of town. I dont worry so much when he is gone because I can call the hotel room but I do worry when he is on the road, especially when he is on the road for a long time. Well, this particular time, they were coming home from near Difficult Child. He had a 6 hour drive to make. He is the driver. Well, the night before he told me that they were leaving at noon that following day so I expected him about 6 or 7 that evening. </p><p></p><p>6 came...no Tony. 7 came ...no Tony. 8...9...10...no Tony.</p><p></p><p>By 11 I was getting frantic and I called his bosses wife and she said she had not heard from them either.</p><p></p><p>Well when he walked in the door about 12 midnite I let him have it with both barrels. I was furious. I was throwing things, I had punched two new holes in the walls, I had thrown his clothes in the yard, I told him to get the F out of the house, I called him everything but a child of god. </p><p></p><p>Wanna know why they were late? They had to work till 6. But I didnt even let him get that explanation in and when I started getting angry, he got angry and the match was on. </p><p></p><p>I couldnt realize at that time that I wasnt angry, I was scared. I was terrified that because he wasnt home when he said he was going to be home, that he was hurt or lost or on the side of the road dead or any other sort horrible thing. </p><p></p><p>Our solution to this...we have two cellphones now and he takes his with him so I can contact him. This has solved many of these issues.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 439974, member: 1514"] Well granted I dont think that someone smaller than me could ever contain me unless it was one of my kids because I wouldnt want to hurt them. I so badly needed limits and someone to contain me and show me that no matter how bad I was that they werent going to leave me or throw me away and I think that is what every person with borderline needs. We think we are trash and are going to be tossed away. I will be honest here and say that Ms Ally may have one thing wrong, it isnt YOU that needs to start being the one to hug and love her, its daddy. She needs to be brought almost back to a little girl and feel like daddy's little princess. The therapy is going to have to be lengthy though. It is tough. She will have to learn to handle feeling irritated and not lash out. I can now get witchy or snappy and just pout or ask for a hug because I dont feel well when before I would throw a plate across the room. Let me give a prime example of something that happened right at the beginning of therapy. Tony works in construction and often works out of town. I dont worry so much when he is gone because I can call the hotel room but I do worry when he is on the road, especially when he is on the road for a long time. Well, this particular time, they were coming home from near Difficult Child. He had a 6 hour drive to make. He is the driver. Well, the night before he told me that they were leaving at noon that following day so I expected him about 6 or 7 that evening. 6 came...no Tony. 7 came ...no Tony. 8...9...10...no Tony. By 11 I was getting frantic and I called his bosses wife and she said she had not heard from them either. Well when he walked in the door about 12 midnite I let him have it with both barrels. I was furious. I was throwing things, I had punched two new holes in the walls, I had thrown his clothes in the yard, I told him to get the F out of the house, I called him everything but a child of god. Wanna know why they were late? They had to work till 6. But I didnt even let him get that explanation in and when I started getting angry, he got angry and the match was on. I couldnt realize at that time that I wasnt angry, I was scared. I was terrified that because he wasnt home when he said he was going to be home, that he was hurt or lost or on the side of the road dead or any other sort horrible thing. Our solution to this...we have two cellphones now and he takes his with him so I can contact him. This has solved many of these issues. [/QUOTE]
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Daisy...here is that poem on borderline for you
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