I have a son who has had major school refusal over the years, and while it can look like ODD, there's likely something else that's fueling your son's school refusal. A probable candidate is anxiety, although other disorders and circumstances can cause school refusal.
Have you talked to the teachers and school administration about what's going on at school? Do they have any idea what's triggering his school refusal? Does your son have an IEP?
I seem to remember you're having him evaluated at this time. What kind of professional is doing the evaluation?
There are a couple of different thoughts about dealing with school refusal. First, figure out the root cause of the refusal, address it and the school refusal will disappear. Or second, the child must go to school regardless. That is the tack our psychiatrist recommended for our son because he has longterm anxiety and depression that is taking quite a while to resolve. If he had refused school throughout his illness, he would have missed a couple of years. And by law, that is not allowed. A child must go to school or receive an appropriate educational substitute privately or at home. Because my son is bigger than I, it required my husband to carry him to the car day after day last year (sometimes in his underwear, with clothes brought along in a bag) to get him to school. At the same time, he was seeing a psychiatrist weekly for medication management and psychotherapy. The good news is that our interventions are paying off. While my son still may not like to go to school, he now gets into the car on his own power. It's not perfect, but we are making progress.
I wish you luck in figuring out what's going on with your son.
