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General Parenting
difficult child 1 had a major meltdown at a friend's
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<blockquote data-quote="buddy" data-source="post: 524336" data-attributes="member: 12886"><p>No answers, I think because it is so multi-dimensional. As you said, if it was a matter of his not knowing that would be one thing, but the problem is the impulse control type of thing, maybe even a fight/flight response....they are just so upset that there are no brakes even if at a calm time they can tell you the consequences and what better choices should be made. </p><p></p><p>I believe Q when he says he is never going to do that again, and he can list what he should and shouldn't do, but still when the recipe comes together the wrong way, he goes off.</p><p></p><p>Beyond being right there to coach them AT that moment, keeping up with medications and yes, rehearsing options over and over (even though they already know them, deepening the neurological roads to make them the ones traveled more frequently...at least that is the idea).... I dont know what to do. For us, it is why Q is rarely on his own. I do take small chances just outside of our house but I am on our deck or sitting right by the window and listening in for any sign of trouble. Trying to intervene the second there is an issue even brewing. </p><p></p><p>That at this point is back-firing too because of course he doesn't like to have his mom or Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) watching so he acts up in front of htem saying rude things to us to act like he doesn't really need us etc. Makes him look far more "different" but he can't see that. He thinks the attention they pay then, means they like him/he is "cool" but it is that they think he is over the top, sometimes they are scared, sick of it, etc.... They continue to try and give him chances but they dont like it. I stress every time he is with other kids.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="buddy, post: 524336, member: 12886"] No answers, I think because it is so multi-dimensional. As you said, if it was a matter of his not knowing that would be one thing, but the problem is the impulse control type of thing, maybe even a fight/flight response....they are just so upset that there are no brakes even if at a calm time they can tell you the consequences and what better choices should be made. I believe Q when he says he is never going to do that again, and he can list what he should and shouldn't do, but still when the recipe comes together the wrong way, he goes off. Beyond being right there to coach them AT that moment, keeping up with medications and yes, rehearsing options over and over (even though they already know them, deepening the neurological roads to make them the ones traveled more frequently...at least that is the idea).... I dont know what to do. For us, it is why Q is rarely on his own. I do take small chances just outside of our house but I am on our deck or sitting right by the window and listening in for any sign of trouble. Trying to intervene the second there is an issue even brewing. That at this point is back-firing too because of course he doesn't like to have his mom or Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) watching so he acts up in front of htem saying rude things to us to act like he doesn't really need us etc. Makes him look far more "different" but he can't see that. He thinks the attention they pay then, means they like him/he is "cool" but it is that they think he is over the top, sometimes they are scared, sick of it, etc.... They continue to try and give him chances but they dont like it. I stress every time he is with other kids. [/QUOTE]
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difficult child 1 had a major meltdown at a friend's
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