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General Parenting
difficult child 2 given citation today for "cheating"
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 253586" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>I'd be down at the school sitting on the steps waiting to talk to the principal (or deputy) as soon as they arfe available. This is one of those times I'd have my thermos of coffee, my knitting/good book and nanna blanket, so it's clear that I'm going to wait patiently but not leave until I've had the chance to be heard. The Ghandi approach.</p><p></p><p>Go VERY carefully re Principal's son - we had a scenario like this with difficult child 3 and his class teacher a few years ago. This teacher & I had been friends from before she had kids, she & I used to drop in on each other & chat. SHe never taught any other of my kids, b ut difficult child 3, b ut by then happened to have a son the same age as difficult child 3, in his class. Her son was the ringleader of the bullies (one of the ringleaders) but would often get difficult child 3 into trouble. This teacher seemed to me to be still myh friend and to be supportive of difficult child 3, although I didn't always agree with her assessment of a situation. I only found out a few months ago, that in fact SHE was the one who was actively campaigning to cvause trouble for difficult child 3, who was the one who adviseed another parent to lay charges with the police after difficult child 3 hit her son (who had been sticking sharp things into difficult child 3 over many months, with no teacher stopping it, despite adult witnesses to this hgappening - they reported it to me, as well as the teachers, but it kept happening).</p><p>Incidents with this teacher's son would invariably end with difficult child 3 on detention, even when I found out from other kids that difficult child 3 was again the victim of being thumped by the son, yet difficult child 3 was punished and the other boy got off.</p><p></p><p>What I'm saying - when a teacher is also a parent, they have a vested interest in THEIR child never being in the wrong, so they will always blame the most vulnerable and likely to crumble victim. Such a teacher will almost always support the version that protects their child's repyation, because the kid's reputation directly reflects on the teacher-parent. They're much worse than the usual parent of bullying child in denial.</p><p>That is why a teacher shouldn't teach their own child and should preferably work at a different school. That way they can just be a parent, and not have added face to lose.</p><p></p><p>ANd although I'm still on friendly terms with thiswoman who tried to get my son into legal trouble, I haven;t had the opportunity to speak to her since I found out. I probably won't say anything to her (no point - too long ago, and I think she did finally see that difficult child 3 is basically a decent, honest kid) but I know I will never trust her again, or confide in her again. For her to have ever done what she did, without talking to me about it but instead going behind my back - she never was the friend I thought.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 253586, member: 1991"] I'd be down at the school sitting on the steps waiting to talk to the principal (or deputy) as soon as they arfe available. This is one of those times I'd have my thermos of coffee, my knitting/good book and nanna blanket, so it's clear that I'm going to wait patiently but not leave until I've had the chance to be heard. The Ghandi approach. Go VERY carefully re Principal's son - we had a scenario like this with difficult child 3 and his class teacher a few years ago. This teacher & I had been friends from before she had kids, she & I used to drop in on each other & chat. SHe never taught any other of my kids, b ut difficult child 3, b ut by then happened to have a son the same age as difficult child 3, in his class. Her son was the ringleader of the bullies (one of the ringleaders) but would often get difficult child 3 into trouble. This teacher seemed to me to be still myh friend and to be supportive of difficult child 3, although I didn't always agree with her assessment of a situation. I only found out a few months ago, that in fact SHE was the one who was actively campaigning to cvause trouble for difficult child 3, who was the one who adviseed another parent to lay charges with the police after difficult child 3 hit her son (who had been sticking sharp things into difficult child 3 over many months, with no teacher stopping it, despite adult witnesses to this hgappening - they reported it to me, as well as the teachers, but it kept happening). Incidents with this teacher's son would invariably end with difficult child 3 on detention, even when I found out from other kids that difficult child 3 was again the victim of being thumped by the son, yet difficult child 3 was punished and the other boy got off. What I'm saying - when a teacher is also a parent, they have a vested interest in THEIR child never being in the wrong, so they will always blame the most vulnerable and likely to crumble victim. Such a teacher will almost always support the version that protects their child's repyation, because the kid's reputation directly reflects on the teacher-parent. They're much worse than the usual parent of bullying child in denial. That is why a teacher shouldn't teach their own child and should preferably work at a different school. That way they can just be a parent, and not have added face to lose. ANd although I'm still on friendly terms with thiswoman who tried to get my son into legal trouble, I haven;t had the opportunity to speak to her since I found out. I probably won't say anything to her (no point - too long ago, and I think she did finally see that difficult child 3 is basically a decent, honest kid) but I know I will never trust her again, or confide in her again. For her to have ever done what she did, without talking to me about it but instead going behind my back - she never was the friend I thought. Marg [/QUOTE]
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difficult child 2 given citation today for "cheating"
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