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difficult child 3 attacked again
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 68764" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>husband is home today - pure coincidence but I'm grateful. He's not getting the day off he was supposed to be having. easy child 2/difficult child 2 is also home, she's supposed to be at work but is sick. BF2 also had today off, like husband, so we have a full house, almost!</p><p></p><p>I woke with a vicious headache which meant I had to call the doctor for a painkiller/antiemetic shot. The receptionist answered, profusely apologetic. Their 6 year old was apparently involved yesterday. The older kids were telling him to throw things and to say things - have been for some time. And because he's little and wants to belong, he does it. His older brother was in difficult child 3's class (use to bully him a bit, too - no more). The receptionist has become a good friend, I've been helping her with a few things. She was appalled and has banned her little bloke from having anything to do with the kid she blames for dragging him into trouble. He's grounded.</p><p></p><p>It seems a neighbour was driving past and saw what was happening - she went to the receptionist and told her; older son heard and headed out to drag little brother home. difficult child 3 did say he saw older brother there, right at the end. </p><p>We'd given one name to the police last night. Sounds like that kid sang like a canary, for receptionist's son to have been visited. She said the police was the last straw for the kid - he'd already had mum, big brother and dad yammering at him so when the police arrived the little kid knew why!</p><p></p><p>When I turned up at the surgery this morning, I know I looked dreadful - these headaches do horrible things to me. Although I know a lot of things are responsible for this, I didn't go into detail with my friend, I'll happily let her use my lousy condition today to make her son's friends and their parents feel even more guilty.</p><p></p><p>husband & I just went for a walk (well, HE was walking anyway) to see if we could find "the log". We found a lot of freshly broken off banksia cones - this was happening in a grove of the trees. And because difficult child 3 said the log that had been thrown was spiky and knobbly, we thought it was highly likely it was also banskia - and we found it. It WAS a log, for sure. A good 6" in diameter with a lot of sharp spikes. I'm amazed it didn't do a lot more damage.</p><p></p><p>We just sent an email to the school, with photos of the log, and difficult child 3 bleeding. We kept the email fairly gentle - "We know you can't be responsible for what kids do late in the afternoon, but this is a combined school and community problem - these kids bring the same attitude to school and this gang mentality is anarchy and is damaging to both school and community."</p><p>I suggested a program of educating kids about tolerance and compassion, offering to help by talking to them about what it's like to be disabled. I'm hoping to shame them into doing something about this - they've been getting told for years that these problems were getting out of hand, and all we've had from them is either, "kids will be kids - they've got to rough and tumble to learn how to get on with each other," to handouts on the topic of "resiliency".</p><p>Other schools in NSW, as well as our Dept of Education, ALL have a strict policy when it comes to bullying. They also enforce it. So this is not typical. But because this is a small, isolated community, I think teachers in the past have held back from disciplining bullies where the teachers were afraid of the parents of those kids. It's easier to find a scapegoat whose parents won't threaten them. But as I learned long ago, you must stand up to bullies, not let them win, ESPECIALLY when you live in a small community, because if you let it continue, the problem escalates.</p><p></p><p>The log is in our garden. A trophy, as I suggested to difficult child 3. And in our garden, it can't be used to hurt anybody.</p><p></p><p>husband was lurking on the site this morning and told me that a lot of you had replied - thank you to all of you, it really helps me to keep perspective, knowing you guys can see what is happening too.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 68764, member: 1991"] husband is home today - pure coincidence but I'm grateful. He's not getting the day off he was supposed to be having. easy child 2/difficult child 2 is also home, she's supposed to be at work but is sick. BF2 also had today off, like husband, so we have a full house, almost! I woke with a vicious headache which meant I had to call the doctor for a painkiller/antiemetic shot. The receptionist answered, profusely apologetic. Their 6 year old was apparently involved yesterday. The older kids were telling him to throw things and to say things - have been for some time. And because he's little and wants to belong, he does it. His older brother was in difficult child 3's class (use to bully him a bit, too - no more). The receptionist has become a good friend, I've been helping her with a few things. She was appalled and has banned her little bloke from having anything to do with the kid she blames for dragging him into trouble. He's grounded. It seems a neighbour was driving past and saw what was happening - she went to the receptionist and told her; older son heard and headed out to drag little brother home. difficult child 3 did say he saw older brother there, right at the end. We'd given one name to the police last night. Sounds like that kid sang like a canary, for receptionist's son to have been visited. She said the police was the last straw for the kid - he'd already had mum, big brother and dad yammering at him so when the police arrived the little kid knew why! When I turned up at the surgery this morning, I know I looked dreadful - these headaches do horrible things to me. Although I know a lot of things are responsible for this, I didn't go into detail with my friend, I'll happily let her use my lousy condition today to make her son's friends and their parents feel even more guilty. husband & I just went for a walk (well, HE was walking anyway) to see if we could find "the log". We found a lot of freshly broken off banksia cones - this was happening in a grove of the trees. And because difficult child 3 said the log that had been thrown was spiky and knobbly, we thought it was highly likely it was also banskia - and we found it. It WAS a log, for sure. A good 6" in diameter with a lot of sharp spikes. I'm amazed it didn't do a lot more damage. We just sent an email to the school, with photos of the log, and difficult child 3 bleeding. We kept the email fairly gentle - "We know you can't be responsible for what kids do late in the afternoon, but this is a combined school and community problem - these kids bring the same attitude to school and this gang mentality is anarchy and is damaging to both school and community." I suggested a program of educating kids about tolerance and compassion, offering to help by talking to them about what it's like to be disabled. I'm hoping to shame them into doing something about this - they've been getting told for years that these problems were getting out of hand, and all we've had from them is either, "kids will be kids - they've got to rough and tumble to learn how to get on with each other," to handouts on the topic of "resiliency". Other schools in NSW, as well as our Dept of Education, ALL have a strict policy when it comes to bullying. They also enforce it. So this is not typical. But because this is a small, isolated community, I think teachers in the past have held back from disciplining bullies where the teachers were afraid of the parents of those kids. It's easier to find a scapegoat whose parents won't threaten them. But as I learned long ago, you must stand up to bullies, not let them win, ESPECIALLY when you live in a small community, because if you let it continue, the problem escalates. The log is in our garden. A trophy, as I suggested to difficult child 3. And in our garden, it can't be used to hurt anybody. husband was lurking on the site this morning and told me that a lot of you had replied - thank you to all of you, it really helps me to keep perspective, knowing you guys can see what is happening too. Marg [/QUOTE]
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