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Difficult child and stepchildren
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<blockquote data-quote="WearyMomof2" data-source="post: 742578" data-attributes="member: 23447"><p>I'm very certain he is not autistic. I do believe his issues are more anxiety than ADHD. He is very attuned to people's emotions, he's well spoken and he doesn't have any particular interests. Immaturity is a symptom of ADHD and that's much of his problem. Much of his behaviors are very typical of much younger kids. The judgements come in when he's 12 and he acts like a 6 year old. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>I don't know how to get my stepsons to stop resenting my son. I go to support groups for families with autism and other mothers talk about how wonderful and understanding their neurotypical children are supporting their autistic sibs. I wanted that so badly for my son. My stepsons are good kids and wonderful around their brothers. I had such high hopes that they would accept him and he could become one of their brothers. Instead, they just keep track of his mistakes. I do protect him. We take disciplining my stepsons very seriously. My husband is former military, so he is very strict with his sons but very kind to my son. It helps my son have a father in his life. What my stepsons can't handle is that jealousy that my son does get so much time with their dad. Before we were married, my husband had a special day with my son, just the two of them. They went out to breakfast, went to a Dodgers game. My son said it was the best day ever. Then he told his stepbrothers about it. To this day, they resent him for it. My husband said if he had to do it again, he wouldn't have done it. Now we try to keep things more equal between them but it really can't be equal. My son needs more time and with me so focused on my daughter, my husband is needed to parent my son. He's excellent at it but it comes with the jealousy issues with my stepsons. They don't have a problem with their younger brother getting more attention but my son, they get jealous and resentful about.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="WearyMomof2, post: 742578, member: 23447"] I'm very certain he is not autistic. I do believe his issues are more anxiety than ADHD. He is very attuned to people's emotions, he's well spoken and he doesn't have any particular interests. Immaturity is a symptom of ADHD and that's much of his problem. Much of his behaviors are very typical of much younger kids. The judgements come in when he's 12 and he acts like a 6 year old. I don't know how to get my stepsons to stop resenting my son. I go to support groups for families with autism and other mothers talk about how wonderful and understanding their neurotypical children are supporting their autistic sibs. I wanted that so badly for my son. My stepsons are good kids and wonderful around their brothers. I had such high hopes that they would accept him and he could become one of their brothers. Instead, they just keep track of his mistakes. I do protect him. We take disciplining my stepsons very seriously. My husband is former military, so he is very strict with his sons but very kind to my son. It helps my son have a father in his life. What my stepsons can't handle is that jealousy that my son does get so much time with their dad. Before we were married, my husband had a special day with my son, just the two of them. They went out to breakfast, went to a Dodgers game. My son said it was the best day ever. Then he told his stepbrothers about it. To this day, they resent him for it. My husband said if he had to do it again, he wouldn't have done it. Now we try to keep things more equal between them but it really can't be equal. My son needs more time and with me so focused on my daughter, my husband is needed to parent my son. He's excellent at it but it comes with the jealousy issues with my stepsons. They don't have a problem with their younger brother getting more attention but my son, they get jealous and resentful about. [/QUOTE]
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