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General Parenting
difficult child angry at me again!
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<blockquote data-quote="everywoman" data-source="post: 266936" data-attributes="member: 1436"><p>A very long time ago I learned to do nice things for the people I love simply because I wanted to do them and quit expecting appreciation in return. I think that fits under detachment. You learn that you can't control what they say and do, you can only control the way you react. I did things like fixing up rooms because it made me feel good to see it nice and clean. I bought them things because I wanted to. I did special things because I wanted to do them, not because I wanted anything from them. When the did appreciate those things, it was nice. If they didn't, it was their problem. I had enjoyed doing what I did, so that is where my satisfaction came from. It seems to me you keep doing and doing expecting him to appreciate all your effort. You are doing for him----start doing for yourself.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="everywoman, post: 266936, member: 1436"] A very long time ago I learned to do nice things for the people I love simply because I wanted to do them and quit expecting appreciation in return. I think that fits under detachment. You learn that you can't control what they say and do, you can only control the way you react. I did things like fixing up rooms because it made me feel good to see it nice and clean. I bought them things because I wanted to. I did special things because I wanted to do them, not because I wanted anything from them. When the did appreciate those things, it was nice. If they didn't, it was their problem. I had enjoyed doing what I did, so that is where my satisfaction came from. It seems to me you keep doing and doing expecting him to appreciate all your effort. You are doing for him----start doing for yourself. [/QUOTE]
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