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General Parenting
difficult child has me on. the. edge. VENTVENTVENT...LONG
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 296222" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>I am SO SORRY! I cannot believe he had the nerve to go and report husband for grabbing his arm. It really sounds like it was difficult child. I tend to think you are right and he was scared because he realized that it would be real jail, not juvie stuff.</p><p></p><p>He still lives in your home after trying to bring charges against your husband for grabbing his arm?</p><p></p><p>I guess that is part of it that I don't get. My kids are free to report us for child abuse. But they best be sure, because there are no take-backs in my family. Not for that. They had best be ready to move to a new home. IF we hurt them, then they need a new home at least temporarily because we are not being the kind of parents we should be. If they did it to get out of something, or to have something to hold over on us, well, I won't live with them after that kind of allegation. I have seen too many lives and families ruined because some difficult child decided to work the system and allege abuse when he was told no.</p><p></p><p>Your difficult child is 19. Does he have a plan as to where to move to? He will continue to charge you with assault to the point it damages your career and all other aspects of your life. It sounds like he left the house to go allege assault so that when husband reported the "intruder" he would already be the "injured" party. It is a good scheme to keep you and husband under control, for as long as you allow it.</p><p></p><p>Has he refused services to help him transition into the community? What are his plans after he drives you out of your home by bringing charges that lead in loss of your or husband's jobs or both? </p><p></p><p>I strongly suggest you and husband sit down and come to terms with what happened, how it is to be handled in the future and what will happen if difficult child brings or tries to bring charges against you or husband. </p><p></p><p>Then you need to sit difficult child down. If he really feels in danger, then he needs to move out ASAP. You love him enough to let him go if he feels he is in danger. If he chooses to stay, you need to let him know that his residence will be gone if he tries that stunt again.</p><p></p><p>My kids are far too afraid of what I would do to try to allege abuse. Not that i ever hurt them or ever would. Just that I am more devious than they are and will not be held over that ledge, ever.</p><p></p><p>Many hugs and I hope that someday soon he has his own home and you can have yours all to your and husband's selfs.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 296222, member: 1233"] I am SO SORRY! I cannot believe he had the nerve to go and report husband for grabbing his arm. It really sounds like it was difficult child. I tend to think you are right and he was scared because he realized that it would be real jail, not juvie stuff. He still lives in your home after trying to bring charges against your husband for grabbing his arm? I guess that is part of it that I don't get. My kids are free to report us for child abuse. But they best be sure, because there are no take-backs in my family. Not for that. They had best be ready to move to a new home. IF we hurt them, then they need a new home at least temporarily because we are not being the kind of parents we should be. If they did it to get out of something, or to have something to hold over on us, well, I won't live with them after that kind of allegation. I have seen too many lives and families ruined because some difficult child decided to work the system and allege abuse when he was told no. Your difficult child is 19. Does he have a plan as to where to move to? He will continue to charge you with assault to the point it damages your career and all other aspects of your life. It sounds like he left the house to go allege assault so that when husband reported the "intruder" he would already be the "injured" party. It is a good scheme to keep you and husband under control, for as long as you allow it. Has he refused services to help him transition into the community? What are his plans after he drives you out of your home by bringing charges that lead in loss of your or husband's jobs or both? I strongly suggest you and husband sit down and come to terms with what happened, how it is to be handled in the future and what will happen if difficult child brings or tries to bring charges against you or husband. Then you need to sit difficult child down. If he really feels in danger, then he needs to move out ASAP. You love him enough to let him go if he feels he is in danger. If he chooses to stay, you need to let him know that his residence will be gone if he tries that stunt again. My kids are far too afraid of what I would do to try to allege abuse. Not that i ever hurt them or ever would. Just that I am more devious than they are and will not be held over that ledge, ever. Many hugs and I hope that someday soon he has his own home and you can have yours all to your and husband's selfs. [/QUOTE]
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difficult child has me on. the. edge. VENTVENTVENT...LONG
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