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General Parenting
difficult child Left Home....Temporarily (I think)
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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 435167" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>I see your point, Marg, but if I'd EVER become aggressive with my mother, much less rob her with a knife, the whole town- sd, cops, everyone- would have stopped me in my tracks. No one would ever have told her what she should change- even though she is a complete flake. There is something to be said for finding a balance between EITHER concentrating on "what the parent should do differently" and actually concentrating on what the kid can wake up to. IOW, I get the fact that we can only change ourselves- but why is it no one has given my son that talk- that if he gets frustrated or whatever, he can only change himself and not me?? He has to learn how to conform to the world, too, everyone in the world can't change to meet his desires. When and how are our difficult children supposed to learn that if the "help" we get as parents only feeds the idea that it's us (parents) that should change? They sure don;t learn it once they've been thrown away in the Department of Juvenile Justice system.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 435167, member: 3699"] I see your point, Marg, but if I'd EVER become aggressive with my mother, much less rob her with a knife, the whole town- sd, cops, everyone- would have stopped me in my tracks. No one would ever have told her what she should change- even though she is a complete flake. There is something to be said for finding a balance between EITHER concentrating on "what the parent should do differently" and actually concentrating on what the kid can wake up to. IOW, I get the fact that we can only change ourselves- but why is it no one has given my son that talk- that if he gets frustrated or whatever, he can only change himself and not me?? He has to learn how to conform to the world, too, everyone in the world can't change to meet his desires. When and how are our difficult children supposed to learn that if the "help" we get as parents only feeds the idea that it's us (parents) that should change? They sure don;t learn it once they've been thrown away in the Department of Juvenile Justice system. [/QUOTE]
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difficult child Left Home....Temporarily (I think)
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