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Parent Emeritus
difficult child logic (illogic) and difficult child threats...tired of it.
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 590563" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Need your wisdom and feedback.</p><p></p><p>I was at the place I volunteer at today and the phone rang and I saw a strange phone number so I answered. It was a 1-800. It was my son. I don't even think he read my text messages to him about how not to call me if he was going to be nasty and swear, but he was decent to me so I figured he must have and maybe it had worked.</p><p></p><p>Ha!</p><p></p><p>He just called again and we were talking. He said something like, "If I get J. only every other weekend and once during the week, I lost J."</p><p></p><p>I said, "You can't think of it that way. That's not losing J. It's just getting less time than you want with him. You will still be in his life."</p><p></p><p>Son lost it: "If you EVER say that again, we're done."</p><p></p><p>Me: Say what?</p><p></p><p>Son: That getting J. on weekends and once a week doesn't mean I lost J. If you ever say it again...ever...we are done.</p><p></p><p>(He has said we are done if I say this or that before. He however is a loose cannon)</p><p></p><p>Then he started going on with the threat about what he'd do if I said it so I said, "Well, right now, I'm done with this call" and hung up. </p><p></p><p>It's amazing how a child without a drug problem can be such an incredible difficult child. Sometimes I wonder how he'd exist if he made good on his threat. Out of all my kids, he is the one who is the neediest. After the blow up conversation last night, in which 35 was screaming and swearing so that my entire family could hear him, Jumper said, "Why do you even talk to him? He's such a baby."</p><p></p><p>I already lost one son, so I'm a bit vulnerable to this threat, but I can't let him swear, scream and abuse me and I never know when he's going to lose it. Did what I say about not losing J. if he lost time with his son not make sense? I think so. </p><p></p><p>Most of the time, I think of my family as my husbabnd, my pastry chef daughter, Sonic and Jumper. I always know they'll be nice to me. 35 is really a wildcard. He isn't very nice in general. That's why he got himself into trouble with custody and, although I don't like his ex, I'm sure he gave her plenty to be unhappy about. </p><p></p><p>Should I risk losing another child? I'm tired of kissing his feet. And to be honest, when he was married, I barely heard from him and his siblings can't stomach him. They know how he treats me. What would you do if you were in this situation? I don't like having to watch every word I say or I get threatened to be put in the trash can.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 590563, member: 1550"] Need your wisdom and feedback. I was at the place I volunteer at today and the phone rang and I saw a strange phone number so I answered. It was a 1-800. It was my son. I don't even think he read my text messages to him about how not to call me if he was going to be nasty and swear, but he was decent to me so I figured he must have and maybe it had worked. Ha! He just called again and we were talking. He said something like, "If I get J. only every other weekend and once during the week, I lost J." I said, "You can't think of it that way. That's not losing J. It's just getting less time than you want with him. You will still be in his life." Son lost it: "If you EVER say that again, we're done." Me: Say what? Son: That getting J. on weekends and once a week doesn't mean I lost J. If you ever say it again...ever...we are done. (He has said we are done if I say this or that before. He however is a loose cannon) Then he started going on with the threat about what he'd do if I said it so I said, "Well, right now, I'm done with this call" and hung up. It's amazing how a child without a drug problem can be such an incredible difficult child. Sometimes I wonder how he'd exist if he made good on his threat. Out of all my kids, he is the one who is the neediest. After the blow up conversation last night, in which 35 was screaming and swearing so that my entire family could hear him, Jumper said, "Why do you even talk to him? He's such a baby." I already lost one son, so I'm a bit vulnerable to this threat, but I can't let him swear, scream and abuse me and I never know when he's going to lose it. Did what I say about not losing J. if he lost time with his son not make sense? I think so. Most of the time, I think of my family as my husbabnd, my pastry chef daughter, Sonic and Jumper. I always know they'll be nice to me. 35 is really a wildcard. He isn't very nice in general. That's why he got himself into trouble with custody and, although I don't like his ex, I'm sure he gave her plenty to be unhappy about. Should I risk losing another child? I'm tired of kissing his feet. And to be honest, when he was married, I barely heard from him and his siblings can't stomach him. They know how he treats me. What would you do if you were in this situation? I don't like having to watch every word I say or I get threatened to be put in the trash can. [/QUOTE]
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difficult child logic (illogic) and difficult child threats...tired of it.
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