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Substance Abuse
difficult child starts this morning . . . new worries
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<blockquote data-quote="Nancy" data-source="post: 514219" data-attributes="member: 59"><p>Kathy it really does seem as though are difficult child's are living parallel lives and we have the same worries. I was terrified when difficult child started working. You're right, we spend all this time worrying about them getting a job and then when they get it there are new worries. FWIW we told difficult child not to talk about her living arrangements or recovery at work and not to put anything on facebook that would out her. We advised her not to make friends on fb with any of the people she worked with for the time being. She was on probation for 90 days and it was important that she didn't give them any reason to fire her.</p><p></p><p>It's hard, we are talking about young people who want to feel like they fit in and especially for your difficult child who feels she doesn't fit with the people she is living in the sober house with. She will want to fit in at work. My advice is to tell her to tread softly. I think what the owneer told her baout not becoming too friendly with the stylists is good. compare it to how you operate at school, that you are a teacher and while you can be friendly with your students you would never discuss anything private with them. Also caution her on not telling the bosses anything about her orivate life. As you know my difficult child learned that the hard way when she told them at her old job that she was pregnant. She said they were all encouraging to her, and then she was fired the next week.</p><p></p><p>I worry constantly about difficult child in the non sober world. It use to be I was worried about her getting invoilved with a guy who was in the program for obvious reasons. It is now the opposite and I am worried about her becoming involved with a guy who drinks. It's unrealistic to expect your or my difficult child to turn down alcohol or drugs if they are in the environment. Drinking is a bit harder because it is everywhere, hopefully she can stay away from drugs.</p><p></p><p>I think all we can do is keep encouraging them and reminding them that their job is the most important thing they have to work for right now, besides sobriety I mean. It is her road to finncial independence. It will be hard but she can do it if she does the next right thing, one thing at a time.</p><p></p><p>Tell us about her first day on the job later.</p><p></p><p>Nancy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy, post: 514219, member: 59"] Kathy it really does seem as though are difficult child's are living parallel lives and we have the same worries. I was terrified when difficult child started working. You're right, we spend all this time worrying about them getting a job and then when they get it there are new worries. FWIW we told difficult child not to talk about her living arrangements or recovery at work and not to put anything on facebook that would out her. We advised her not to make friends on fb with any of the people she worked with for the time being. She was on probation for 90 days and it was important that she didn't give them any reason to fire her. It's hard, we are talking about young people who want to feel like they fit in and especially for your difficult child who feels she doesn't fit with the people she is living in the sober house with. She will want to fit in at work. My advice is to tell her to tread softly. I think what the owneer told her baout not becoming too friendly with the stylists is good. compare it to how you operate at school, that you are a teacher and while you can be friendly with your students you would never discuss anything private with them. Also caution her on not telling the bosses anything about her orivate life. As you know my difficult child learned that the hard way when she told them at her old job that she was pregnant. She said they were all encouraging to her, and then she was fired the next week. I worry constantly about difficult child in the non sober world. It use to be I was worried about her getting invoilved with a guy who was in the program for obvious reasons. It is now the opposite and I am worried about her becoming involved with a guy who drinks. It's unrealistic to expect your or my difficult child to turn down alcohol or drugs if they are in the environment. Drinking is a bit harder because it is everywhere, hopefully she can stay away from drugs. I think all we can do is keep encouraging them and reminding them that their job is the most important thing they have to work for right now, besides sobriety I mean. It is her road to finncial independence. It will be hard but she can do it if she does the next right thing, one thing at a time. Tell us about her first day on the job later. Nancy [/QUOTE]
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difficult child starts this morning . . . new worries
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