I don't know, at 12, you're still bigger than them. If one of my kids swung out a hand in anger at me I would grab it but quick, look them straight in the eye, and explain in no uncertain terms that while I may never have spanked them, I will not hesitate to defend myself (and my other children) any time, any day, any how.
I guess I'm a little confused. Is this the difficult child 12 year old boy who has been investigated for molesting this 8 year old sister, and you are requesting an immediate evaluation? You have kind of gone back and forth from it being "only a one time thing" to not knowing what it was. Your description of him as "used to love her" and "threatening her, pushing her, hitting her and correcting her constantly" is kind of disturbing. Is it possible that whatever has been going on between them he is a little more than angry at you for putting the brakes on him?
Honestly, your son sounds at best like a bully.
