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difficult child - tired....
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<blockquote data-quote="missy44" data-source="post: 293286" data-attributes="member: 6201"><p>i agree, buying the beer was a bad idea. lesson learned.</p><p> </p><p>we're learning, we are seeing a therapist, our son is deeply involved in therapy and we try to follow all of the advice we can (although some is contradicting, we take every piece to heart).</p><p> </p><p>we have rules, we're sticking to our rules and hoping to move forward from here. I just talked to his psyc and he has reassured me that our difficult child has made great strides but that we should expect ups and downs and try to head these issues off a little better then we have. </p><p> </p><p>we get so proud of him and let our guard down. we are committed to work on that issue. we are committed to help him with positive steps he takes in his life, not the negative. it's such a fine line and it's difficult.</p><p> </p><p>it's not always easy with husband and i, but he's in it for the long haul and i love him for it. we try to stay on the same page (doesn't always happen that way) but we try.</p><p> </p><p>we are layihg out the rules and telling him he must follow them under our roof. we're waiting to meet with the psyc to go over the specifics of the consequences (we need help). the "tough love" part of me tells me shape up or ship out. The psyc is trying to keep it so that we take into account all of the positives and focus on that. He agrees that we need consequences (which he and our difficult child will assist with) but that we need to expect and prepare for the 10 steps forward and 8 steps back. Each backward step is supposed to be less severe... fingers crossed.</p><p> </p><p>it's so difficult to not be 'black and white" with a difficult child. I don't want to deal with the grey areas.</p><p> </p><p>our main issue right now is respect, respect and then some more respect. if he earns it, he'll get it. that's the only way he'll build trust and continue building a better life for himself. i truly feel in my heart that he will be okay in the long run (maybe hopeful thinking) but i think the road is going to bumpy and long.</p><p> </p><p>i'll let you know how it turns out after today.</p><p> </p><p>Thanks again all.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="missy44, post: 293286, member: 6201"] i agree, buying the beer was a bad idea. lesson learned. we're learning, we are seeing a therapist, our son is deeply involved in therapy and we try to follow all of the advice we can (although some is contradicting, we take every piece to heart). we have rules, we're sticking to our rules and hoping to move forward from here. I just talked to his psyc and he has reassured me that our difficult child has made great strides but that we should expect ups and downs and try to head these issues off a little better then we have. we get so proud of him and let our guard down. we are committed to work on that issue. we are committed to help him with positive steps he takes in his life, not the negative. it's such a fine line and it's difficult. it's not always easy with husband and i, but he's in it for the long haul and i love him for it. we try to stay on the same page (doesn't always happen that way) but we try. we are layihg out the rules and telling him he must follow them under our roof. we're waiting to meet with the psyc to go over the specifics of the consequences (we need help). the "tough love" part of me tells me shape up or ship out. The psyc is trying to keep it so that we take into account all of the positives and focus on that. He agrees that we need consequences (which he and our difficult child will assist with) but that we need to expect and prepare for the 10 steps forward and 8 steps back. Each backward step is supposed to be less severe... fingers crossed. it's so difficult to not be 'black and white" with a difficult child. I don't want to deal with the grey areas. our main issue right now is respect, respect and then some more respect. if he earns it, he'll get it. that's the only way he'll build trust and continue building a better life for himself. i truly feel in my heart that he will be okay in the long run (maybe hopeful thinking) but i think the road is going to bumpy and long. i'll let you know how it turns out after today. Thanks again all. [/QUOTE]
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