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difficult child transported by police to phosph -
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<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 188534" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>Steely, hon - tears of relief here.</p><p> </p><p>I'm truly sorry that it came about as it did, but I'm honestly just so thankful that you're both safe and that he is in the hospital. Bless the officers who heard you and got him to a facility you're comfortable with.</p><p> </p><p>And *huge* kudos to you for just saying "no" to the "mandatory" visits. I know how hard that must have been but I think it was a very wise choice. You absolutely need to focus on your well-being right now,</p><p> </p><p>For today, tomorrow, the next few days - focus on the day. There is still no way to know what his future holds. Much (if not all) of it is in his hands. See what psychiatric hospital staff come up with. It sounds like he really lost touch with reality and that some medication changes are in order - hopefully they will be able to stabilize him quickly.</p><p> </p><p>I'd hold off on making any decisions about him returning home for at least few days, if you can. When the time comes, this week, next week, next year (because the time *will* and should come), then you need to make peace with the decision that he needs to live somewhere else and you also need to make peace with the fact that his future is not in your hands. Telling thank you that he will never be living here full time again was physically painful for me, Steely. Honestly, *the* hardest thing I've ever done. I love my kid so much and want so much for him... but I cannot fight his skewed thought processes anymore. I cannot keep fighting for treatment and services when he adamantly refuses to participate and in fact, is unmoveable in his belief that he's fine and everyone else has the problem. </p><p> </p><p>We cannot force treatment on our adult kids. We can't force safe environments, safe housing, safe employment. We cannot force education or hygiene or even legal behavior. Our hands are tied, regardless of whether we're guardians or not. We've tried to prepare them, we can continue to offer them resources, but we have to at some point start letting go and let them find their way. The worry and fear about my kid's future sometimes overwhelms me to the point of paralysis. But there is nothing more I can do. </p><p> </p><p>But these are thoughts for another day, hon. Please, please, take care of yourself right now. Matt is safe. You are safe. Let the hospital staff do their jobs and you just take care of you, okay? </p><p> </p><p>A gentle hug to you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 188534, member: 8"] Steely, hon - tears of relief here. I'm truly sorry that it came about as it did, but I'm honestly just so thankful that you're both safe and that he is in the hospital. Bless the officers who heard you and got him to a facility you're comfortable with. And *huge* kudos to you for just saying "no" to the "mandatory" visits. I know how hard that must have been but I think it was a very wise choice. You absolutely need to focus on your well-being right now, For today, tomorrow, the next few days - focus on the day. There is still no way to know what his future holds. Much (if not all) of it is in his hands. See what psychiatric hospital staff come up with. It sounds like he really lost touch with reality and that some medication changes are in order - hopefully they will be able to stabilize him quickly. I'd hold off on making any decisions about him returning home for at least few days, if you can. When the time comes, this week, next week, next year (because the time *will* and should come), then you need to make peace with the decision that he needs to live somewhere else and you also need to make peace with the fact that his future is not in your hands. Telling thank you that he will never be living here full time again was physically painful for me, Steely. Honestly, *the* hardest thing I've ever done. I love my kid so much and want so much for him... but I cannot fight his skewed thought processes anymore. I cannot keep fighting for treatment and services when he adamantly refuses to participate and in fact, is unmoveable in his belief that he's fine and everyone else has the problem. We cannot force treatment on our adult kids. We can't force safe environments, safe housing, safe employment. We cannot force education or hygiene or even legal behavior. Our hands are tied, regardless of whether we're guardians or not. We've tried to prepare them, we can continue to offer them resources, but we have to at some point start letting go and let them find their way. The worry and fear about my kid's future sometimes overwhelms me to the point of paralysis. But there is nothing more I can do. But these are thoughts for another day, hon. Please, please, take care of yourself right now. Matt is safe. You are safe. Let the hospital staff do their jobs and you just take care of you, okay? A gentle hug to you. [/QUOTE]
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