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difficult child wants to call his egg donor
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<blockquote data-quote="Mikey" data-source="post: 133564" data-attributes="member: 3579"><p>Not sure what to tell you, but wife is adopted. Her BM was 16 when she was born, and wife was taken straight from the delivery room to her adoptive parents. BM never even saw her as a newborn.</p><p></p><p>There came a day, though, early in our marriage when wife decided she wanted to look up her bio parents. Health reasons, genetics, many reasons. But primarily, it was curiosity that got her sniffing for more. Her dad is great, and is a better man than I will ever be. He was worried about wife talking to her bio's, but in the end let his 20-something daughter make her own decisions.</p><p></p><p>wife met her bio parents. They were nice. Found out how wife "came to be"; teen love/lust, her 15yo mom gets to "visit" her aunt in another state for a year (8 months, actually), then come back home. Nobody's the wiser. Only, that episode ruined her bio mom. Her bio dad never even knew she existed. Like I said, they were nice, but in the end they were no threat to wife's <strong>real</strong> dad, the man who raised her. </p><p></p><p>It took a lot of guts for her dad to give her the info to contact her bio's; a lot of guts, and a lot of trust. But, just as wife finally put to rest her curiosity about her bio parents, her Dad finally got to put to rest his worry about being surplanted by the ghosts from wife's past. He was her Dad, and by selflessly letting wife explore her past, he was only confirmed in that role more solidly than before.</p><p></p><p>Does that mean you should help your difficult child with his BM, or worry (or not worry) about the outcome? I don't know, and wouldn't hazard to guess. I just wanted to pass on that while you're probably seeing the worst that could happen, know that good can come from such events, too. </p><p></p><p>Hope that helps in some small way.</p><p></p><p>Mikey</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mikey, post: 133564, member: 3579"] Not sure what to tell you, but wife is adopted. Her BM was 16 when she was born, and wife was taken straight from the delivery room to her adoptive parents. BM never even saw her as a newborn. There came a day, though, early in our marriage when wife decided she wanted to look up her bio parents. Health reasons, genetics, many reasons. But primarily, it was curiosity that got her sniffing for more. Her dad is great, and is a better man than I will ever be. He was worried about wife talking to her bio's, but in the end let his 20-something daughter make her own decisions. wife met her bio parents. They were nice. Found out how wife "came to be"; teen love/lust, her 15yo mom gets to "visit" her aunt in another state for a year (8 months, actually), then come back home. Nobody's the wiser. Only, that episode ruined her bio mom. Her bio dad never even knew she existed. Like I said, they were nice, but in the end they were no threat to wife's [B]real[/B] dad, the man who raised her. It took a lot of guts for her dad to give her the info to contact her bio's; a lot of guts, and a lot of trust. But, just as wife finally put to rest her curiosity about her bio parents, her Dad finally got to put to rest his worry about being surplanted by the ghosts from wife's past. He was her Dad, and by selflessly letting wife explore her past, he was only confirmed in that role more solidly than before. Does that mean you should help your difficult child with his BM, or worry (or not worry) about the outcome? I don't know, and wouldn't hazard to guess. I just wanted to pass on that while you're probably seeing the worst that could happen, know that good can come from such events, too. Hope that helps in some small way. Mikey [/QUOTE]
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