The only way I know of is to force her to go or give her a strong consequence if she such wont, such as making her leave for not helping herself. This may or may not make her go...she could fake going and not really go or she might. If she goes she can talk to the therapist or else not talk. You won't be sure what really happens. At her age, you have no legal options. All is on her.
I have tried, but have never found any way to force anyone else, especially my daughter, to do anything she doesn't want to do. You can control your reaction to what another does or doesn't do, but you can't say just the right magical words to make anyone do anything they don't want to do. I wish we could!
A doctor is unable to tell you anything about even a family member without written permission from the person.
You eventually learn that you can't control anyone but yourself in most therapy, AA and Al Anon groups, which may be why your husband doesn't push. Pushing doesn't work and he is discouraged from enabling her in AA. He is correctly working his program.
For years I didn't believe that I should let go and let God, and I tried to get Kay to change, in spite of being told it won't work. I finally believe it now. It didnt help a bit. I wish would have known long ago.
If you have God in your life, my best advice is to focus on your own life to make it good, and give your daughter to God. Be well.
