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Parent Emeritus
difficult child's joblessness is getting to me. Not sure where to go from here
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<blockquote data-quote="CrazyinVA" data-source="post: 551552" data-attributes="member: 1157"><p>I think applying for services is a great idea in many cases, and it is obviously a Godsend for many people. But unfortunately with adult difficult children, they have to want to do it, and to invest the time and effort. Neither of my daughters will apply or even look into disability, even though they both have issues that might qualify them. I can't make them do it. Heck I can't even get Oldest to apply to the free clinic which would cover her medical needs for her Crohn's. She just continues to get care through the ER when needed, and throws the hospital bills away. I'm not going to make the effort any more because I've learned the hard way that it's a wasted one (for my difficult children, that is). I used to look up numbers, send links to information, print off forms, etc., but no one was interested in any of it. I stopped. Another part of the old "I was working harder than they were" scenario. </p><p></p><p>I realize that doesn't apply to everyone's difficult children, but for mine, staying out of that is part of my own detachment journey. It's another "if it were me I'd be doing x , y and z!" trap for me. I stay out of it.</p><p></p><p>I don't say that to discourage anyone from trying this with their own kids, because obviously each case is different. I think it's a great suggestion. I just wanted to point out that with treatment resistent difficult children, it can be a frustrating effort. Everyone has to decide for themselves, though.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="CrazyinVA, post: 551552, member: 1157"] I think applying for services is a great idea in many cases, and it is obviously a Godsend for many people. But unfortunately with adult difficult children, they have to want to do it, and to invest the time and effort. Neither of my daughters will apply or even look into disability, even though they both have issues that might qualify them. I can't make them do it. Heck I can't even get Oldest to apply to the free clinic which would cover her medical needs for her Crohn's. She just continues to get care through the ER when needed, and throws the hospital bills away. I'm not going to make the effort any more because I've learned the hard way that it's a wasted one (for my difficult children, that is). I used to look up numbers, send links to information, print off forms, etc., but no one was interested in any of it. I stopped. Another part of the old "I was working harder than they were" scenario. I realize that doesn't apply to everyone's difficult children, but for mine, staying out of that is part of my own detachment journey. It's another "if it were me I'd be doing x , y and z!" trap for me. I stay out of it. I don't say that to discourage anyone from trying this with their own kids, because obviously each case is different. I think it's a great suggestion. I just wanted to point out that with treatment resistent difficult children, it can be a frustrating effort. Everyone has to decide for themselves, though. [/QUOTE]
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difficult child's joblessness is getting to me. Not sure where to go from here
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