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difficult child's problem with stepmother
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<blockquote data-quote="AnnieO" data-source="post: 577911" data-attributes="member: 6705"><p>I'm a little late to this thread but I have to bring my $0.02 to the table... As a stepmother.</p><p></p><p>Now my 2 had some abuse in their past but let me put that aside for now. My husband had to stop responding to bio's texts and emails because of the extreme anxiety they caused him. To be honest, even after the court ordered them to use a neutral website, that could be viewed by the court itself... She was not very nice to him there, either, and even accused me of things like stealing. Basically when the kids went to her house they were rewarded for saying horrible stuff about me and husband... And for causing problems for us.</p><p></p><p>Now, to put things in perspective, easy child is a people pleaser and the stepmom is pretty wonderful. easy child wants everyone to just get along. But difficult child says differently, that stepmom is, well, wicked. Stepmom has never wanted to talk to you - not a shocker, to be honest - if you and XH don't get along, what could he have told her? What kinds of acting out from difficult child is she having to handle? If husband is being a complete ostrich, she may have to handle the good, bad, ugly and completely HORRIBLE. You know, I don't - you are Mom!</p><p></p><p>So... Is it possible that she identifies more with easy child - both females - and difficult child is jealous of the attention? Considering XH doesn't seem to be terribly involved?</p><p></p><p>I'm not saying this woman is blameless. Honestly I've said things to Onyxx and Jett that I never should have. I've not been a perfect stepmom. <em>Especially</em> when Onyxx acts out.</p><p></p><p>difficult child needs therapy... Don't ever give up there. And it does look as if you need to sit down with a mediator or lawyer. But... Please don't assume she is just horrible based on what difficult child tells you. difficult children are known for exaggerating... Snapping at someone because you are overwhelmed is a long way from screaming at them, but this is exactly what happened with us! Onyxx told bio I'd screamed at her all weekend... I got snippy once according to husband, that weekend. (It's happened more, I'm human...)</p><p></p><p><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/hugs.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":hugs:" title="hugs :hugs:" data-shortname=":hugs:" /> I do hope it's an exaggeration. Still, if XH can't be bothered... You need a custody change, and perhaps XMIL will even help...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="AnnieO, post: 577911, member: 6705"] I'm a little late to this thread but I have to bring my $0.02 to the table... As a stepmother. Now my 2 had some abuse in their past but let me put that aside for now. My husband had to stop responding to bio's texts and emails because of the extreme anxiety they caused him. To be honest, even after the court ordered them to use a neutral website, that could be viewed by the court itself... She was not very nice to him there, either, and even accused me of things like stealing. Basically when the kids went to her house they were rewarded for saying horrible stuff about me and husband... And for causing problems for us. Now, to put things in perspective, easy child is a people pleaser and the stepmom is pretty wonderful. easy child wants everyone to just get along. But difficult child says differently, that stepmom is, well, wicked. Stepmom has never wanted to talk to you - not a shocker, to be honest - if you and XH don't get along, what could he have told her? What kinds of acting out from difficult child is she having to handle? If husband is being a complete ostrich, she may have to handle the good, bad, ugly and completely HORRIBLE. You know, I don't - you are Mom! So... Is it possible that she identifies more with easy child - both females - and difficult child is jealous of the attention? Considering XH doesn't seem to be terribly involved? I'm not saying this woman is blameless. Honestly I've said things to Onyxx and Jett that I never should have. I've not been a perfect stepmom. [I]Especially[/I] when Onyxx acts out. difficult child needs therapy... Don't ever give up there. And it does look as if you need to sit down with a mediator or lawyer. But... Please don't assume she is just horrible based on what difficult child tells you. difficult children are known for exaggerating... Snapping at someone because you are overwhelmed is a long way from screaming at them, but this is exactly what happened with us! Onyxx told bio I'd screamed at her all weekend... I got snippy once according to husband, that weekend. (It's happened more, I'm human...) :hugs: I do hope it's an exaggeration. Still, if XH can't be bothered... You need a custody change, and perhaps XMIL will even help... [/QUOTE]
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