JJJ, the problem with the external motivator theory is, with kids like Kanga and my difficult children, they figure a way to get around the external motivator and still get what they want. They move from out right stealing to conning someone out of their possessions. It is a way for them to save face but still get what they want. It ends up being another dishonest way for them to "have their cake and eat it, too". My difficult children, especially difficult child 2, are master cons. They figured out early you are less likely to get in trouble if you can con someone into giving you the item then stealing it outright. When you are sweet, pretty and polite, it seems to be true. :-(
