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The Watercooler
Dilemma re ex-husband
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<blockquote data-quote="katya02" data-source="post: 564795" data-attributes="member: 2884"><p>I only have a couple of minutes, but wanted to respond ... now that I'm over the initial shock and fear of my diagnosis I can see how a crisis this big can provide a push where it's needed. Although I'd already gotten out of my marriage and now I'm in a complicated mess through accepting help from my ex, I do have a sense of immediacy now, of not being willing to waste any precious time on futile or unhealthy things. I know everyone's time is limited; we just don't know if today is the day we'll step in front of that bus, so to speak. Cancer puts your mortality squarely in front of you and forces you to look it in the eye. I think in the long run it WILL give me more determination to accomplish what's important. </p><p></p><p>I never thought of my non-friendship with the jerk as being my first post-divorce relationship, but I guess that's true lol! If so I DID get off lucky. I could've persisted a long time and ended up with far more hurt. At least I showed some self-respect as it ended. And (go ahead, laugh) I've read a bunch of books since, on men and dating, and I just shake my head at how naive I was and am, a target with a bulls-eye on my forehead. Probably a little Aspie if truth be told, looking at the big picture. But I can learn. I can protect myself in future.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="katya02, post: 564795, member: 2884"] I only have a couple of minutes, but wanted to respond ... now that I'm over the initial shock and fear of my diagnosis I can see how a crisis this big can provide a push where it's needed. Although I'd already gotten out of my marriage and now I'm in a complicated mess through accepting help from my ex, I do have a sense of immediacy now, of not being willing to waste any precious time on futile or unhealthy things. I know everyone's time is limited; we just don't know if today is the day we'll step in front of that bus, so to speak. Cancer puts your mortality squarely in front of you and forces you to look it in the eye. I think in the long run it WILL give me more determination to accomplish what's important. I never thought of my non-friendship with the jerk as being my first post-divorce relationship, but I guess that's true lol! If so I DID get off lucky. I could've persisted a long time and ended up with far more hurt. At least I showed some self-respect as it ended. And (go ahead, laugh) I've read a bunch of books since, on men and dating, and I just shake my head at how naive I was and am, a target with a bulls-eye on my forehead. Probably a little Aspie if truth be told, looking at the big picture. But I can learn. I can protect myself in future. [/QUOTE]
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Dilemma re ex-husband
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