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Discipline Question
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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 130612" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>My take on it is a little like Smallworld's. My difficult child used to have periods where he yelled and seemed uncontrollable and angry at me when he was little. This might be a lot different than your situation- difficult child's seemed to always happen right after being in day care for 9 hours or being over-stimulated (not enough sleep). I found that difficult child can't have the amount of candy, sodas, etc. that typical kids have, he needs more sleep- his schedule is critical, and according to his pediatrician- "they do this to Mom because Mom is their "safe place"." The pediatrician said not to worry about yelling, screaming, seemingly anger- he said he is venting. So, I would tell difficult child in a calm way to go to his room and yell all he wanted, I would not get mad, but he couldn't "bad-mouth" me and he could come out once he had calmed down some. If he wanted to ask questions then, that would be fine. Of course it wasn't always that easy- I strained a muscle in my neck once grabbing him up and carrying him down the hall to make sure he knew that "yes, he would go to his room when I said so". </p><p></p><p>on the other hand, my difficult child was considered a close to easy child when he was that age. It does sound to me that yours is showing more signs of a mood disorder now and I'm not sure that parenting technique can completely stop those reactions. I just bring that up so you don't fall in the trap of feeling like if you did something differently, it would all go away. It sounds to me like it won't- maybe medications can help. Have you tried- and does it help- to give him certain some periods of the day when he can have more "free time" to do things that he has more choices about, then have the rest of the day where he "has" to do what the schedule or routine dictates? Can you find any apttern in it or see it as him feeling like he doesn't have enough control or does it seem like things are not a problem until he gets mad at you?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 130612, member: 3699"] My take on it is a little like Smallworld's. My difficult child used to have periods where he yelled and seemed uncontrollable and angry at me when he was little. This might be a lot different than your situation- difficult child's seemed to always happen right after being in day care for 9 hours or being over-stimulated (not enough sleep). I found that difficult child can't have the amount of candy, sodas, etc. that typical kids have, he needs more sleep- his schedule is critical, and according to his pediatrician- "they do this to Mom because Mom is their "safe place"." The pediatrician said not to worry about yelling, screaming, seemingly anger- he said he is venting. So, I would tell difficult child in a calm way to go to his room and yell all he wanted, I would not get mad, but he couldn't "bad-mouth" me and he could come out once he had calmed down some. If he wanted to ask questions then, that would be fine. Of course it wasn't always that easy- I strained a muscle in my neck once grabbing him up and carrying him down the hall to make sure he knew that "yes, he would go to his room when I said so". on the other hand, my difficult child was considered a close to easy child when he was that age. It does sound to me that yours is showing more signs of a mood disorder now and I'm not sure that parenting technique can completely stop those reactions. I just bring that up so you don't fall in the trap of feeling like if you did something differently, it would all go away. It sounds to me like it won't- maybe medications can help. Have you tried- and does it help- to give him certain some periods of the day when he can have more "free time" to do things that he has more choices about, then have the rest of the day where he "has" to do what the schedule or routine dictates? Can you find any apttern in it or see it as him feeling like he doesn't have enough control or does it seem like things are not a problem until he gets mad at you? [/QUOTE]
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