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General Parenting
Disciplining my son
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<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 94396" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>Physical discipline rarely works for our kids anyway. It just teaches them that violence is acceptable. Sadly, what works one day will often not work the next. As you said, they can't always control their behavior, the impulse control mechanism is just plain missing. Sometimes you can teach it to them, many times you can't and you just have to wait for them to grow up. So, here's another vote for skipping the physical discipline.</p><p></p><p>Rewards frequently work better than consequences, especially with the younger ones. Often, a combination of consequences and rewards is the trick. Make the rules very clear and put them on posters he can understand. You can also have a reward chart (this was a disaster for me because my daughter would have a meltdown if she didn't earn a star) for things like no meltdowns for one hour=a star, etc. Doing things in 15-minute increments can be useful. I found that if my daughter did her homework in 15-minute spurts with 5-10 minutes in between of something like snacks, music, tv, it got the homework done with less meltdowns.</p><p></p><p>You can order The Explosive Child through Amazon. Also, your local library probably has a copy. Most do.</p><p></p><p>(Isn't it nice to not get blasted and actually have your opinion validated?)</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 94396, member: 3626"] Physical discipline rarely works for our kids anyway. It just teaches them that violence is acceptable. Sadly, what works one day will often not work the next. As you said, they can't always control their behavior, the impulse control mechanism is just plain missing. Sometimes you can teach it to them, many times you can't and you just have to wait for them to grow up. So, here's another vote for skipping the physical discipline. Rewards frequently work better than consequences, especially with the younger ones. Often, a combination of consequences and rewards is the trick. Make the rules very clear and put them on posters he can understand. You can also have a reward chart (this was a disaster for me because my daughter would have a meltdown if she didn't earn a star) for things like no meltdowns for one hour=a star, etc. Doing things in 15-minute increments can be useful. I found that if my daughter did her homework in 15-minute spurts with 5-10 minutes in between of something like snacks, music, tv, it got the homework done with less meltdowns. You can order The Explosive Child through Amazon. Also, your local library probably has a copy. Most do. (Isn't it nice to not get blasted and actually have your opinion validated?) [/QUOTE]
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