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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 302691"><p>I agree, the emotional upheaval is exhausting when adult "children" continue to make poor choices and I'm sorry for your aching heart. </p><p> </p><p>Your "kids" have hit 21 and older. It is time to really look at this differently. It's not easy and it hurts, but chances are high that this is the best way to approach it all.</p><p> </p><p>They have a diagnosis and because of this, I personally am open to helping to provide medical treatment. I do think mental health counseling can provide hope. Are your kids seeing a therapist? Would you be able to help with this treatment? Are they willing and able to go?</p><p> </p><p>Please take extra good care of YOURSELF. What goooood does it do them, you, your significant other, friends, employer, neighbors, the world...for you to walk around in a funk.</p><p> </p><p>Yes, it is ashame, but it is their choice at this point....again, I repeat 21 and older. </p><p> </p><p>They are saddled with a diagnosis. Medication and therapy is likely to be helpful. However, it is their choice to take medication and therapy. It is their choice to be thinking people, to learn from mistakes and to take appropriate actions that would enhance their lives.</p><p> </p><p>YOU can NOT do this for them. And you can make a choice to live a happier life.</p><p> </p><p>It hurts....it is rotten place/space for you. But it "is what it is." Again, I repeat...you do no good to yourself and others by worrying. You also set a bad example for your children when you worry tooo much or do toooo much.</p><p> </p><p>If you see that your adult children are taking advantage of you or making poor choices...pull back and pull back in a hurry. Stop. No more.</p><p> </p><p>You sense this is wrong...you sense correctly.</p><p> </p><p>You might offer to help when and where you can on a LIMITED basis that would NOT NOT NOT in any way shape or form, hurt you and if and only if you are being treated in an appropriate way.</p><p> </p><p>in my humble opinion, I would see what services are available in your community for low cost mental health treatment and offer to help with this for the kids if they are not receiving treament. Let the professionals carry some of this weight. And I would pull back significantly in your care/worries with- these "children." Furthermore, I would explore what YOU enjoy in life and I would do this asap. You will feel much better.</p><p> </p><p>Wishing you peace and happiness.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 302691"] I agree, the emotional upheaval is exhausting when adult "children" continue to make poor choices and I'm sorry for your aching heart. Your "kids" have hit 21 and older. It is time to really look at this differently. It's not easy and it hurts, but chances are high that this is the best way to approach it all. They have a diagnosis and because of this, I personally am open to helping to provide medical treatment. I do think mental health counseling can provide hope. Are your kids seeing a therapist? Would you be able to help with this treatment? Are they willing and able to go? Please take extra good care of YOURSELF. What goooood does it do them, you, your significant other, friends, employer, neighbors, the world...for you to walk around in a funk. Yes, it is ashame, but it is their choice at this point....again, I repeat 21 and older. They are saddled with a diagnosis. Medication and therapy is likely to be helpful. However, it is their choice to take medication and therapy. It is their choice to be thinking people, to learn from mistakes and to take appropriate actions that would enhance their lives. YOU can NOT do this for them. And you can make a choice to live a happier life. It hurts....it is rotten place/space for you. But it "is what it is." Again, I repeat...you do no good to yourself and others by worrying. You also set a bad example for your children when you worry tooo much or do toooo much. If you see that your adult children are taking advantage of you or making poor choices...pull back and pull back in a hurry. Stop. No more. You sense this is wrong...you sense correctly. You might offer to help when and where you can on a LIMITED basis that would NOT NOT NOT in any way shape or form, hurt you and if and only if you are being treated in an appropriate way. in my humble opinion, I would see what services are available in your community for low cost mental health treatment and offer to help with this for the kids if they are not receiving treament. Let the professionals carry some of this weight. And I would pull back significantly in your care/worries with- these "children." Furthermore, I would explore what YOU enjoy in life and I would do this asap. You will feel much better. Wishing you peace and happiness. [/QUOTE]
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