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Discussion about funeral arrangement with family
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<blockquote data-quote="WiscKaren" data-source="post: 123028" data-attributes="member: 4507"><p>My mom did not want a funeral, but did want to be buried. Because of legal reasons, we had to set up her funeral before she died. That was emotionally draining. My mom suffered from agorphobia for many years, so everything was left up to me (being her only daughter and my two brothers did not want to be part of it). </p><p></p><p>She died suddenly in my home in 2001. She had mentioned that her one brother, if he wanted too, could come to the funeral home to pay his respects. So, I met him there. And I was shocked!! Here he had called her other brother, and my mom and him had not spoken to each other in years (like 20+), and all their kids and their kids' kids were there. I was too stunned to say anything. Her estranged brother walked in and said, "It's nice not to see you with a scowl on your face finally". I cried so hard, but maintained myself for out of respect to my mom.</p><p></p><p>We did have a graveside service. They all came out there. And her estranged brother had the adacity to help carry her casket to the grave. I was stunned. I didn't ask him; he just took it upon himself.</p><p></p><p>If I had known this, I would not have asked her one brother to come to pay his respects. I felt like I did not honor my mother's wishes -- and to this day, it bothers me immensely.</p><p></p><p>My funeral arrangements are done. At the time I die, I only hope my wishes are followed.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="WiscKaren, post: 123028, member: 4507"] My mom did not want a funeral, but did want to be buried. Because of legal reasons, we had to set up her funeral before she died. That was emotionally draining. My mom suffered from agorphobia for many years, so everything was left up to me (being her only daughter and my two brothers did not want to be part of it). She died suddenly in my home in 2001. She had mentioned that her one brother, if he wanted too, could come to the funeral home to pay his respects. So, I met him there. And I was shocked!! Here he had called her other brother, and my mom and him had not spoken to each other in years (like 20+), and all their kids and their kids' kids were there. I was too stunned to say anything. Her estranged brother walked in and said, "It's nice not to see you with a scowl on your face finally". I cried so hard, but maintained myself for out of respect to my mom. We did have a graveside service. They all came out there. And her estranged brother had the adacity to help carry her casket to the grave. I was stunned. I didn't ask him; he just took it upon himself. If I had known this, I would not have asked her one brother to come to pay his respects. I felt like I did not honor my mother's wishes -- and to this day, it bothers me immensely. My funeral arrangements are done. At the time I die, I only hope my wishes are followed. [/QUOTE]
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