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<blockquote data-quote="SadToTheCore" data-source="post: 751702" data-attributes="member: 24044"><p>I cannot express my deep appreciation for the responses here. I have felt so alone for so many years. I can relate to much of what you all say. Each situation is different, of course, and there is so much to tell with mine. </p><p>J doesn’t believe in smoking marijuana anymore. He hasn’t smoked in 8 years. He does believe that eating the plant raw is healthy, however, and from what I’ve read it may be. He eats Hawaiian Baby Woodrose seeds. They can be purchased anywhere, like Home Depot and often even at the dollar store. Other than that there is no drug use. </p><p>J is honest to a fault. There is only black and white. No grey. He tells it like it is whether or not you want to hear it. He has fully intended to abide by the house rules, but after a few weeks he comes to us and says he has changed his mind. This time he has begged, saying he will do anything we ask of him, but I remind him that he has said that for the past 14 years, and he hasn’t kept his promises. </p><p>J is not violent. When he is eating these seeds, however, he becomes even more delusional and accuses us of heinous things. He is very verbally disrespectful, especially to me, as he knows his dad won’t put up with it. </p><p>I have seen him several times, met him for coffee or whatever, in the past few months. I always bring a friend as a “buffer.” I miss him so. </p><p>The worst news is that when we were out of town a few months ago he got hit by a car and shattered his leg. They performed surgery then and there, and because we couldn’t get back home in time, no one was there for him. I cry about that everyday. I’m sure he was frightened. He wouldn’t allow proper treatment, so the doctors there sent him to a psychiatric hospital for a few days. One of his friends took him in after that, and I went to visit. It was like I had my son back. He was on Abilifi and was calm and kind. He went off the medication almost immediately, and now he is back to being disrespectful and hurtful again. </p><p>He does still make some money from his music, which is a blessing, but I don’t know how much longer that will last. Also, his credit is very bad, so he can’t get an apartment, and he wants us to co-sign. My husband refuses, as we have done this so many times before. He refuses to apply for SSI because he would have to admit to a mental disability, which he is not willing to do. He also doesn’t want to take money from the government. He is very proud. Too proud. </p><p>I would love to go see my other kids and grandkids for the holidays, but I couldn’t bear to leave J alone, as he loves Christmas and being with family. It’s just very uncomfortable to be around him. My husband says this year he will not be around and if I want to include J in our holiday festivities, I surely can, but he will leave. Just one more thing to worry about. </p><p>Knowing that J is living in the woods in a tent is killing me. I honestly don’t know how to disengage. I love him so. </p><p>I pray everyday, all day, in hopes that God will hear me and help our family. </p><p>Thank you so much again for hearing me out.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SadToTheCore, post: 751702, member: 24044"] I cannot express my deep appreciation for the responses here. I have felt so alone for so many years. I can relate to much of what you all say. Each situation is different, of course, and there is so much to tell with mine. J doesn’t believe in smoking marijuana anymore. He hasn’t smoked in 8 years. He does believe that eating the plant raw is healthy, however, and from what I’ve read it may be. He eats Hawaiian Baby Woodrose seeds. They can be purchased anywhere, like Home Depot and often even at the dollar store. Other than that there is no drug use. J is honest to a fault. There is only black and white. No grey. He tells it like it is whether or not you want to hear it. He has fully intended to abide by the house rules, but after a few weeks he comes to us and says he has changed his mind. This time he has begged, saying he will do anything we ask of him, but I remind him that he has said that for the past 14 years, and he hasn’t kept his promises. J is not violent. When he is eating these seeds, however, he becomes even more delusional and accuses us of heinous things. He is very verbally disrespectful, especially to me, as he knows his dad won’t put up with it. I have seen him several times, met him for coffee or whatever, in the past few months. I always bring a friend as a “buffer.” I miss him so. The worst news is that when we were out of town a few months ago he got hit by a car and shattered his leg. They performed surgery then and there, and because we couldn’t get back home in time, no one was there for him. I cry about that everyday. I’m sure he was frightened. He wouldn’t allow proper treatment, so the doctors there sent him to a psychiatric hospital for a few days. One of his friends took him in after that, and I went to visit. It was like I had my son back. He was on Abilifi and was calm and kind. He went off the medication almost immediately, and now he is back to being disrespectful and hurtful again. He does still make some money from his music, which is a blessing, but I don’t know how much longer that will last. Also, his credit is very bad, so he can’t get an apartment, and he wants us to co-sign. My husband refuses, as we have done this so many times before. He refuses to apply for SSI because he would have to admit to a mental disability, which he is not willing to do. He also doesn’t want to take money from the government. He is very proud. Too proud. I would love to go see my other kids and grandkids for the holidays, but I couldn’t bear to leave J alone, as he loves Christmas and being with family. It’s just very uncomfortable to be around him. My husband says this year he will not be around and if I want to include J in our holiday festivities, I surely can, but he will leave. Just one more thing to worry about. Knowing that J is living in the woods in a tent is killing me. I honestly don’t know how to disengage. I love him so. I pray everyday, all day, in hopes that God will hear me and help our family. Thank you so much again for hearing me out. [/QUOTE]
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