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Do you agree with my therapist?
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<blockquote data-quote="Echolette" data-source="post: 618290" data-attributes="member: 17269"><p>another thought which may or may not pertain...my SO supported his 24 year old daughter (who looks a bit GFGish herself when you poke her) while she was "in school" for several years...he didn't go to college himself, and was very committed to the idea that she should get a degree, but not really fluid with what exactly that looks like...after 5 years of supposedly taking classes spring, summer, and fall, and living for free room and board at daddy's, I finally said..what the heck? She should have at least an associates if not an actual bachelors by now. We started asking to see her transcripts, look at school requirements, go to the school counsellour with her...and she was VERY evasive. She does not even have an associates to show for all the school and free living (including long weekends down the shore, fancy manicures, tanning saloon, and more ugg boots that I could fit in my closet). I think she is getting student grants and loans and living off them...to keep that going she just keeps taking introductory classese in everything she can sign up for...which is going nowhere, accruing debt, and just overall dysfunctional. She says "I'm in school"...well kinda. But not really.</p><p></p><p>Fortunately he moved in with me (that has its own issues!!!) and she moved in with friends, and is struggling now with money and bills and real life living. I get tired of the drama of how hard it is for her (she still drives her car to work every day even though she lives right by public transportaiton, and I have yet to see her without a fancy manicure)...but nevertheless, at 24 she is making big steps towards being the adult she should have been for the last 5 years.</p><p></p><p>Although, she came by last night and told him she didn't have the $250 for car insurance that she owes him, and he gave her a pass on on it. These lessons come slowly for both enablers and difficult children</p><p></p><p>The point of this is...what is the school story, really?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Echolette, post: 618290, member: 17269"] another thought which may or may not pertain...my SO supported his 24 year old daughter (who looks a bit GFGish herself when you poke her) while she was "in school" for several years...he didn't go to college himself, and was very committed to the idea that she should get a degree, but not really fluid with what exactly that looks like...after 5 years of supposedly taking classes spring, summer, and fall, and living for free room and board at daddy's, I finally said..what the heck? She should have at least an associates if not an actual bachelors by now. We started asking to see her transcripts, look at school requirements, go to the school counsellour with her...and she was VERY evasive. She does not even have an associates to show for all the school and free living (including long weekends down the shore, fancy manicures, tanning saloon, and more ugg boots that I could fit in my closet). I think she is getting student grants and loans and living off them...to keep that going she just keeps taking introductory classese in everything she can sign up for...which is going nowhere, accruing debt, and just overall dysfunctional. She says "I'm in school"...well kinda. But not really. Fortunately he moved in with me (that has its own issues!!!) and she moved in with friends, and is struggling now with money and bills and real life living. I get tired of the drama of how hard it is for her (she still drives her car to work every day even though she lives right by public transportaiton, and I have yet to see her without a fancy manicure)...but nevertheless, at 24 she is making big steps towards being the adult she should have been for the last 5 years. Although, she came by last night and told him she didn't have the $250 for car insurance that she owes him, and he gave her a pass on on it. These lessons come slowly for both enablers and difficult children The point of this is...what is the school story, really? [/QUOTE]
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