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General Parenting
Double Standards?
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<blockquote data-quote="InsaneCdn" data-source="post: 427473" data-attributes="member: 11791"><p>Perspective matters...</p><p> </p><p>If we applied the approach most want to take with our difficult children, to people with physical disabilities... then:</p><p> </p><p>1) the kid in the wheelchair would have to NOT use the wheelchair for phys ed - because how else will he learn to walk?</p><p> </p><p>2) the blind girl isn't allowed her white cane inside the school, because she might trip someone else - but if she bumps into someone and they get hurt, then we should throw the book at the blind girl... SHE hurt the other person, right?</p><p> </p><p>So, when is it an appropriate accommodation? </p><p> </p><p>I struggle with that, too - untimed tests and technology supports are NOT unfair - the intent is to level the playing field so the students can compete "fairly". Cutting slack for behaviour... depends. History. Exact circumstances. Whether supports are in place at school, how well they are working etc. Its a really, really difficult call.</p><p> </p><p>At home... the same "expectations" apply to all of us (like "responsibility") - but, exact implementation is tailored to the person... one kid's "neat room" may not be the same as the next kid's "neat room" - but each is responsible to get it to a certain level of neatness...</p><p> </p><p>At school - its really tough, because the supports that are available work against the kid, and the supports the kid needs are not available. And then he gets in trouble for "not making use of the supports avilable to him".</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="InsaneCdn, post: 427473, member: 11791"] Perspective matters... If we applied the approach most want to take with our difficult children, to people with physical disabilities... then: 1) the kid in the wheelchair would have to NOT use the wheelchair for phys ed - because how else will he learn to walk? 2) the blind girl isn't allowed her white cane inside the school, because she might trip someone else - but if she bumps into someone and they get hurt, then we should throw the book at the blind girl... SHE hurt the other person, right? So, when is it an appropriate accommodation? I struggle with that, too - untimed tests and technology supports are NOT unfair - the intent is to level the playing field so the students can compete "fairly". Cutting slack for behaviour... depends. History. Exact circumstances. Whether supports are in place at school, how well they are working etc. Its a really, really difficult call. At home... the same "expectations" apply to all of us (like "responsibility") - but, exact implementation is tailored to the person... one kid's "neat room" may not be the same as the next kid's "neat room" - but each is responsible to get it to a certain level of neatness... At school - its really tough, because the supports that are available work against the kid, and the supports the kid needs are not available. And then he gets in trouble for "not making use of the supports avilable to him". [/QUOTE]
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