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<blockquote data-quote="timer lady" data-source="post: 197899" data-attributes="member: 393"><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><strong>Mom of twins here ~ beautiful symbiotic little creatures aren't they? <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/bigsmile.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":bigsmile:" title="big smile :bigsmile:" data-shortname=":bigsmile:" /> Enough to drive a good woman to drink. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/slap.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":slap:" title="slap :slap:" data-shortname=":slap:" /><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/Graemlins/2.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":wine:" title="wine :wine:" data-shortname=":wine:" /><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/Graemlins/rofl.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":rofl:" title="rofl :rofl:" data-shortname=":rofl:" /></strong></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><strong></strong></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><strong>Have you ever read the Love & Logic books? I know the first book advised here is The Explosive Child (it is an extremely good book) however with my twins love & logic worked. There is a sense of competition between our children that is intense. Love & Logic offers ideas; gives our difficult children choices that "we" can live with & lets them play it out. </strong></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><strong></strong></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><strong>I learned early with kt & wm to wear timer's (one for each child) on my collars (hence my board name). One timer wasn't enough when it came to transition time & calling the tweedles in for dinner or bedtime. </strong></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><strong></strong></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><strong>I learned early on to offer kt or wm popcorn or pretzels for snack, shower or bath, cereal or toast, coat or sweat, etc. Things were on my terms however they got to choose. The tweedles began to have a sense of control over their needs & such & therefore began to calm down. </strong></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><strong></strong></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><strong>Early on, I had to teach my difficult children that they were their own person ~ what one did or had, didn't have a thing to do with the other. If one needed new shoes, the other didn't. If one needed to go the doctor, the other didn't., etc.</strong></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><strong></strong></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><strong>My kt is a runner; nothing more frustating or frightening. I cannot offer much other than to get a crisis plan in place for when your difficult child attempts this again.</strong></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><strong></strong></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><strong>Bottom line, you are mom. You know in your heart what your difficult children need. They may have diagnosis's & such. But you know what consequences will make an impact; what rewards will make your difficult child smile & want to please you & follow the rules. Tdocs can make valid suggestions, but they have to work in your home, with the personalities that live there. </strong></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><strong></strong></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><strong>I hope we can help you with your day to day frustrations; with your questions. There is a tremendous group of parents here who will support you, give you a shoulder to lean on & an ear for listening.</strong></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"><strong></strong></span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="timer lady, post: 197899, member: 393"] [SIZE=3][FONT=Comic Sans MS][B]Mom of twins here ~ beautiful symbiotic little creatures aren't they? :bigsmile: Enough to drive a good woman to drink. :slap::toast::rofl: Have you ever read the Love & Logic books? I know the first book advised here is The Explosive Child (it is an extremely good book) however with my twins love & logic worked. There is a sense of competition between our children that is intense. Love & Logic offers ideas; gives our difficult children choices that "we" can live with & lets them play it out. I learned early with kt & wm to wear timer's (one for each child) on my collars (hence my board name). One timer wasn't enough when it came to transition time & calling the tweedles in for dinner or bedtime. I learned early on to offer kt or wm popcorn or pretzels for snack, shower or bath, cereal or toast, coat or sweat, etc. Things were on my terms however they got to choose. The tweedles began to have a sense of control over their needs & such & therefore began to calm down. Early on, I had to teach my difficult children that they were their own person ~ what one did or had, didn't have a thing to do with the other. If one needed new shoes, the other didn't. If one needed to go the doctor, the other didn't., etc. My kt is a runner; nothing more frustating or frightening. I cannot offer much other than to get a crisis plan in place for when your difficult child attempts this again. Bottom line, you are mom. You know in your heart what your difficult children need. They may have diagnosis's & such. But you know what consequences will make an impact; what rewards will make your difficult child smile & want to please you & follow the rules. Tdocs can make valid suggestions, but they have to work in your home, with the personalities that live there. I hope we can help you with your day to day frustrations; with your questions. There is a tremendous group of parents here who will support you, give you a shoulder to lean on & an ear for listening. [/B][/FONT][/SIZE] [/QUOTE]
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