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I agree Kalahou.  I liken it to "repotting" a plant.  Sometimes you need to do that to help the plant grow.  The process for the plant is painful and it needs to be handled gingerly  but then it can grow stronger and more beautiful. Alas when we finally let go of our adult children with loving detachment it cuts to the core of our hearts and souls and I believe theirs as well.  The end product however will be stronger and more beautiful as we dance as two separate beings on our life path , but still walk together on some roads, on our terms.