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Eeyore attacked at school!
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<blockquote data-quote="rlsnights" data-source="post: 308873" data-attributes="member: 7948"><p>In our case, I would never accept difficult child 2's version of events at face value. He is so deep into denial about his feelings and the effect of his actions and words on others that his perceptions are never congruent with those around him. </p><p></p><p>difficult child 2 will stand there and insist (quite sincerely) that he did nothing to provoke the attack. He clearly believes the attack was a random act of violence. </p><p></p><p>In fact you saw him get angry when the other kid cut in line. He gets triggered by the unfairness, leaves his place in line, shoves the other kid out of the line while yelling at him, calling him names and telling him to go to the end of the line. The other kid, humiliated, goes volcanic right back and shoves difficult child 2.</p><p></p><p>When you say to difficult child 2 that you saw what happened and that he started the fight, difficult child 2 may eventually agree that he told the other kid to go to the end of the line but that is as much of an admission as you are likely to from him. He truly believes that he didn't "do" anything.</p><p></p><p>His psychiatrist refers to this as poor reality testing and extreme ego defense.</p><p></p><p>I just know that there is always more to the story than difficult child 2 can tell me and I have to turn to other sources of information if I really want to know what happened.</p><p></p><p>Hope it works out OK and neither boy is suspended or humiliated publicly by an adult. For difficult child 2 the second would be far worse punishment than the first and result in attempts to revenge himself on the other kid. Bad news.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="rlsnights, post: 308873, member: 7948"] In our case, I would never accept difficult child 2's version of events at face value. He is so deep into denial about his feelings and the effect of his actions and words on others that his perceptions are never congruent with those around him. difficult child 2 will stand there and insist (quite sincerely) that he did nothing to provoke the attack. He clearly believes the attack was a random act of violence. In fact you saw him get angry when the other kid cut in line. He gets triggered by the unfairness, leaves his place in line, shoves the other kid out of the line while yelling at him, calling him names and telling him to go to the end of the line. The other kid, humiliated, goes volcanic right back and shoves difficult child 2. When you say to difficult child 2 that you saw what happened and that he started the fight, difficult child 2 may eventually agree that he told the other kid to go to the end of the line but that is as much of an admission as you are likely to from him. He truly believes that he didn't "do" anything. His psychiatrist refers to this as poor reality testing and extreme ego defense. I just know that there is always more to the story than difficult child 2 can tell me and I have to turn to other sources of information if I really want to know what happened. Hope it works out OK and neither boy is suspended or humiliated publicly by an adult. For difficult child 2 the second would be far worse punishment than the first and result in attempts to revenge himself on the other kid. Bad news. [/QUOTE]
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