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Substance Abuse
Either back into intensive outpatient or sober home for two years
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<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 391618" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>Nancy - you are *not* a failure at detachment. Oh my gosh... you are nothing near a failure. We love our kids, we want them to make decent choices, and of course we worry. I think a big part of "detachment" is numbing ourselves. Sometimes I'm really really good at just swallowing my feelings and keeping "detached" - other times, not so much. I think it's harder, for me anyway, when thank you starts making moves in the right direction. I don't cheerlead anymore, I keep my mouth shut, but it's impossible for me to stifle that little bubble of hope that rises in my heart. When he inevitably shoots himself in the foot, I'm so upset (again). It's the same darn rollercoaster we've been on for umpteen years.</p><p></p><p>I understand you worrying about what she will do. Our difficult children have no limits. Nothing is too far for them. At least with- the pcs, I'm pretty certain there are some lines they won't cross - no such luck with- thank you, and when I allow myself to think about it, it's terrifying. So I try *really* hard not to think about it. But I think it's impossible to never go down that dark path.</p><p></p><p>It's absolutely one day at a time. One hour at a time on the really rough days. Take care of yourself, be gentle to yourself. Do what you need to do for difficult child, for your own peace of mind. It may cross over the lines of detachment, but at the end of the day we have to be able to live with ourselves. </p><p></p><p>Many gentle hugs to you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 391618, member: 8"] Nancy - you are *not* a failure at detachment. Oh my gosh... you are nothing near a failure. We love our kids, we want them to make decent choices, and of course we worry. I think a big part of "detachment" is numbing ourselves. Sometimes I'm really really good at just swallowing my feelings and keeping "detached" - other times, not so much. I think it's harder, for me anyway, when thank you starts making moves in the right direction. I don't cheerlead anymore, I keep my mouth shut, but it's impossible for me to stifle that little bubble of hope that rises in my heart. When he inevitably shoots himself in the foot, I'm so upset (again). It's the same darn rollercoaster we've been on for umpteen years. I understand you worrying about what she will do. Our difficult children have no limits. Nothing is too far for them. At least with- the pcs, I'm pretty certain there are some lines they won't cross - no such luck with- thank you, and when I allow myself to think about it, it's terrifying. So I try *really* hard not to think about it. But I think it's impossible to never go down that dark path. It's absolutely one day at a time. One hour at a time on the really rough days. Take care of yourself, be gentle to yourself. Do what you need to do for difficult child, for your own peace of mind. It may cross over the lines of detachment, but at the end of the day we have to be able to live with ourselves. Many gentle hugs to you. [/QUOTE]
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