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The Watercooler
Empathy. Can it be taught to somebody that doesn't already have it?
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<blockquote data-quote="Californiablonde" data-source="post: 599454" data-attributes="member: 2196"><p>Thank you all for your advice. The hard part is I actually grew to love him. I have known him for three years and he was an awesome friend. In the beginning of our relationship he was a great boyfriend. He took me out all the time even though I didn't get cards or gifts. He used to give me lots of compliments and shower me with attention. Since I gained all this weight the compliments have stopped. He hasn't told me he loves me in months. Hasn't hugged or kissed me or even held my hand in the same amount of time. Sex is non existent. He is pushing me to lose this weight. My daughter calls him a big time hypocrite because he has even more weight to lose than I do. I need to lose forty three pounds and he is at least sixty pounds overweight. But he was heavy when we met so I accepted him for who he was. He met me when I was super thin so he was attracted to skinny Amber, not fat Amber. So I get that. I am losing this weight but I am doing it for ME, not him. I am doing it for my health and my self esteem. My self esteem isn't too high right now but I plan on changing that for my own good. He has nothing to do with it. I am actually doing something about it and I can't say the same for him. It's hard and right now I really don't know what to do. He will be living in his car if I kick him out and I wouldn't allow that to happen to anybody. I am going to talk to him tonight and see if I can get somewhere with him.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Californiablonde, post: 599454, member: 2196"] Thank you all for your advice. The hard part is I actually grew to love him. I have known him for three years and he was an awesome friend. In the beginning of our relationship he was a great boyfriend. He took me out all the time even though I didn't get cards or gifts. He used to give me lots of compliments and shower me with attention. Since I gained all this weight the compliments have stopped. He hasn't told me he loves me in months. Hasn't hugged or kissed me or even held my hand in the same amount of time. Sex is non existent. He is pushing me to lose this weight. My daughter calls him a big time hypocrite because he has even more weight to lose than I do. I need to lose forty three pounds and he is at least sixty pounds overweight. But he was heavy when we met so I accepted him for who he was. He met me when I was super thin so he was attracted to skinny Amber, not fat Amber. So I get that. I am losing this weight but I am doing it for ME, not him. I am doing it for my health and my self esteem. My self esteem isn't too high right now but I plan on changing that for my own good. He has nothing to do with it. I am actually doing something about it and I can't say the same for him. It's hard and right now I really don't know what to do. He will be living in his car if I kick him out and I wouldn't allow that to happen to anybody. I am going to talk to him tonight and see if I can get somewhere with him. [/QUOTE]
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Empathy. Can it be taught to somebody that doesn't already have it?
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